Running on the Incorrect Track
View(s):Many tend to seek alternative avenues to escape from being with themselves. The most challenging battle many are facing is being with themselves. During a training I recently conducted, I asked a group of corporate leaders if they could spend time with themselves happily for a minimum of one hour. Most of them found it an arduous task. Unless you appreciate, value and love yourself, you are sure to seek many alternatives to escape from being with yourself simply because you are not contented with yourself.
Many people have escaped life as they do not find themselves worthy enough to be loved and appreciated. People are anxious and depressed as their happiness is based on a third party. Once that source of happiness is ceased from their lives they tend to feel empty. Your partner should not be the prime reason for your existence in this world. The main reason for you to live in this world should be yourself. Everybody else, including your children will go on their own journey and there will come a time that you will be all alone by yourself.
The question I would like to present to you today is, even though no one else may be there with you, “Can you stay with yourself in perfect harmony and happiness?” Or would you constantly condemn yourself based on what you could not achieve in the past? Would you hate yourself for what you have done in the past? Would you find yourself unworthy? Are you blind enough to say that you have nothing to appreciate in yourself? Do you love yourself?
I spend at least one good hour with myself, all alone by myself, even without my beautiful Angel wife and my two adorable children. I constantly train myself to be with myself, as it is less painful and hurtful. The more you are attached, the more pain and suffering you will undergo. I have made a decision to be with myself not merely to appreciate me and love me but also to talk to myself, advise, reprimand and challenge me on the areas that I have messed up during the day and also to contemplate on the areas that I need to develop in myself.
I want to leave behind a legacy as a role model for people who bounce back whenever they are knocked down by challenges in life. I live for a purpose and that purpose is to enlighten the lives of those who are in the dark. I am well aware of how miserable it feels to live in the darkness. I require more time to spend with myself. It is the time for me and me alone. Some people hate themselves and that makes them run in search of happiness in their friends, alcohol, movies, music, social media and many other alternative avenues that they assume would support them to escape from themselves. I am not suggesting you to leave aside everything and live in solitude in a forest. Undoubtedly you and I have to run this race on the race track. The race track of life.
Your laptop or your phone screen is not your track. The track is every real moment in life. We cannot escape that track. The moment we run the race after the use of illegal steroids we will be disqualified from the race. When you can win the race without using steroids then why would you consume them and lose the opportunity of receiving the medal. We have to accustom ourselves to run the race naturally so that we love and appreciate ourselves for who we are and not for who we want to be. We must Love ourselves for our honesty, values, policies, boldness, confidence, energy, focus, resilience and maturity.
I am so determined to gift a million times more to my children than what I got from my parents. If you have not received anything from your parents, then you must yearn even more to provide in abundance for your children. We have brought our children to this world, therefore they are solely our responsibility. It is indeed sad to see many people insanely standing in queues at the bars whilst their children are struggling to eat a healthy meal. There are many Sri Lankans who cannot live without cigarettes and alcohol. The reason behind it is their inability to live by themselves. Self-actualisation will help us to dig deep into ourselves and learn more about ourselves so that we could elevate ourselves towards transforming into stronger personalities, who would never give up amidst challenges.
I was a coward many years ago. I was greatly in need of some kind of drug or the other to escape the slightest challenge in life. I was so blind in realising that the drugs or any other alternative that maybe used were able to only shut the door temporarily whilst the beast is still standing outside the door. If we intend to move forward, we need to destroy the beast of challenges. Shutting the door assuming that the beast will go away will only hallucinate you in to a dream world. The moment we wake up, the challenges grow even bigger. Whilst the door is shut, the beast becomes even more hungry and dangerous. Therefore, running away from problems will never solve our issues, it would rather aggravate the issues further.
Leave behind what happened in the past and choose to rewrite your future. You are capable, it is just that you have not tested your capacity. What you possess is sufficient, it is just that you were only focusing on what your friends have. You are strong, you have just allowed inferiority to take control over you. You are beautiful, you simply compared yourself to Aishwarya Rai. Your speed is adequate, you have unnecessarily been focusing on Usain Bolt’s speed. Do not stop just because you failed at the first attempt. None of us were able to wash our backs while we were babies. Yet, we do it perfectly well now because we continually did it. Success in life is all about climbing one step ahead in comparison to where we were. All you need is what you possess at present. Focusing on what you do not have is similar to dying in hunger, believing that you will receive your favourite meal. Assumptions are good. But one should never rely on them that is why they are known as assumptions. Live every moment by utilising all you possess at this very moment of time.
For Comments: Voice – 0774 88 5656 / e-mail: philipnehri.m@gmail.com / Corporate Trainings & Consultancy: www.philipnehri.com
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