Talk to Yourself or Don’t Talk to Yourself
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The reason a Japanese cannot speak Spanish is simply because their ears have been hearing and listening to Japanese since birth.
Similarly rice and curry has become the authentic meal of every Sri Lankan as our taste buds continuously consume rice and curry thus our mind accepts and approves it as our foremost meal. You become what you lay within yourself.
If you cannot play Hockey that is because you have not tried playing Hockey. What you lay within yourself is crucial as it will turn out to be your ultimate outcome. As Germany Kent states “You become what you digest into your spirit. Whatever you think about, focus on, read about, talk about, you’re going to attract more of into your life. Make sure they’re all positive.”
As a youngster, I often listened to rock music. I started liking it because my closest friend used to be a rock fan, hence I was automatically exposed to it, and thereafter I also continuously listened to rock music. Had I listened to country music, I would have liked it, but since my ears were continuously exposed to rock music, I became a rock fan.
Therefore it is important to be vigilant on what you and your children expose yourselves towards both inwardly and outwardly, it has the potential of positioning your mind patterns and thinking styles leading towards behavioural actions.
Today, I would like to ask you a question. How many times a day do you take time out of your busy schedule to talk to yourself?
As a CEO, I am constantly busy, arranging meetings for various individuals/groups for numerous discussions, but I have come to realise that it is equally important to sit with myself and have a private conversation in order to understand myself and guide myself on the right path. This duologue is two-sided. First you must listen to yourself, thereafter you must talk to yourself.
The first person you approach during a turbulent situation is pivotal, as his/her feedback will influence you in your situation. If you speak to a pessimist you will opt to take that path. Likewise if you talk to yourself and your perspective is enclosed with negative thoughts, you will end up taking the wrong path. Even though it sounds awkward that is the reason my topic says “Talk to yourself or Don’t talk to yourself”. There are times when you must talk to yourself and times you must avoid talking to yourself.
All of us possess two personalities within us, at the outset of a situation you need to understand which personality has emerged, so that you could decide if you should talk to yourself or if you should shut yourself down completely.
The language you use to communicate with yourself is also of utmost importance while handling yourself. Even though chili is used for a spicy dish, it will not be used for a sweet & sour dish, as you will not get the expected outcome by using it. When you are angry, your anger is what arises from your personality pushing you towards destructive activities such as – why don’t you shout back or slam the plate on the floor or break the glass or hit him.
This is when you should not talk to yourself for some time, as you are not constructive at all at this specific moment of time. Emotions are short-lived, therefore you should determine to listen to someone else who can talk to you with energy and spirit that will help you to overturn your fury. Listening and talking go hand in hand thus you have to be meticulous about the moments that you chose to listen to yourself, furthermore it is important how you talk to yourself at such instances.
What comes out of a deep freezer is frozen, what comes out of a hot plate is scorching. Therefore it is important to understand when you must listen and when you must talk to yourself, as the state of your inner mind at that moment plays a pivotal role in deciding what transpires from you at that moment. I listen and talk to myself often, but on some occasions I shut myself down and choose not to listen or talk to myself.
Whenever you talk to yourself, you must ensure that you talk to yourself as if you are talking to your lover. You must speak with words of love, kindness, encouragement, strength, direction and facilitation. We all seek forgiveness, healing, encouragement and guidance.
If we train ourselves to talk to us when our constructive personality is in control, and to not talk to us when our destructive personality is in control, then we will be able to advance without deviation. Many great personalities are known to be self-talkers, they always talk to themselves to assure that they are not deviated through the influence of any third party.
The capacity of our mind is limited therefore the knowledge we can store in our mind is also limited, so we will not be able to find the answers for all the questions in this world. For that reason you ought to listen to a good teacher when you do not know what to tell yourself.
Your teacher will be able to guide you towards the right direction in that situation. This is the reason why many people have personal trainers. Many successful life stories are considered as manuals of success but at times you may find it difficult to adopt their strategies to yours since each person is running a different race.
Therefore, be silent when you should not talk to yourself, talk boldly at times you speak to yourself. You might be bearing unhealed wounds within you for years, it might be a result of a wrong decision you have made some time back. At such occurrences you need to talk to yourself and say that it is alright as there is no one in the world who has not done a mistake.
I have made many mistakes in the past but I have told myself that they are forgiven. Practice speaking to yourself using healing words. Unfortunately many are worsening their wounds with negative thoughts and words. You cannot change what has already happened to you, but you can surely dominate its outcome. Talk to yourself before every event that is relevant to you, encourage yourself, by doing so you will be able to obstruct the negative voices that could come from outside.
Life will become miserable the moment you start hating yourself, by talking to yourself you will elevate your liking towards you. An honest conversation with yourself will purify your conscious. A clear Conscience will uplift your level of energy to move forward. When I was young, I hated myself as there was nothing that I could like about myself, but today I talk to myself and tell myself of all the benefits I have been blessed with, doing so has made me more vibrant and satisfied.
Are you the type of person who would always listen to the outsiders who set you down with many condemnations, discriminations and accusations? If so, talk to yourself with statements of contentment, healing, encouragement, harmony, strength and reassurance. As a habit, I make it a point to spend at least thirty minutes a day with myself, I find that doing so on a daily basis is rather effective.
I make sure that I have a coffee with myself just as I would have a coffee with a friend. I utilize this time to talk to myself about my day, my drawbacks and where I scored well. Self-talking acts as a self-diagnosis tool which will keep you up to date about yourself. The more updated you are about yourself the easier it would be to manage your personality, because you are well aware of your strengths and weaknesses.
For comments: e-mail:
philipnehri@chandanalepa.lk /
voice – 0779526496