Appreciations
View(s):DENNIS T.M.PERERA
A jovial, independent and proud man
Our father, Dennis T.M.Perera was a simple man. A fiercely protective man who put family at the top of all his priorities he would always say, ‘family first’ and he lived by it. He had a strong sense of devotion to his family, immediate and extended, which he also tried to instil in us from a young age.
We recall our term holidays and the long days of sitting at the back of the car desperately trying to entertain ourselves, while we were being driven from Nuwara Eliya to Colombo via Kurunegala, Matale, Chilaw, Negombo and Eheliyagoda.
This was to ensure that we knew our cousins and grew up to consider them, our family. I guess this was the natural instinct of someone who grew up with four brothers and more than 20 cousins.
In 1964, as a young student my father, sailed from Colombo to Southhampton with his wife and 12 years later drove back to Sri Lanka crossing Europe, Middle East and India with his wife and two young children in an Austin Cambridge A60.
Considering some of the serious challenges they faced en route, one might wonder if it was bravery or stupidity! To us, he was a brave adventurer and trailblazer, who did what he wanted to do.
He wanted nothing short of the best for his sons and totally dedicated himself to giving us a comfortable upbringing and the best possible education. It is those efforts which have stood us in good stead and helped navigate the tricky maze of life.
He was a man of few words. That was until the subject of politics was drawn out in conversation. It was then that he made his mark and there was no stopping him !
Ammi and Thaaththi spent over half a century together. Not all perfect, they had their ups and downs but they stuck together and took the rough with the smooth.
He was well loved and valued by the family, friends and workmates and he wore his heart on his sleeve. Father was fortunate and blessed. There were so many people praying for him and helping to make his last days as comfortable as possible.
We thank everyone who supported us during what was a very difficult time for our family. Ammi’s strength as the primary carer needs special mention. Thaaththi was a jovial, independent and proud man.
He lived a good life, did his duties diligently and had no regrets. He was a loving and caring husband and a committed father to both of us. He will be sorely missed by all those who knew and loved him.
-Rohan and Sriantha Perera
Rev. Canon John Isaac
Toiling ceaselessly in the faith
John Isaac was born on January 12, 1922 to Rev. J.S. Isaac and Christina Isaac. He was named fittingly- for John was the name of a disciple in the Bible known as the son of thunder and Isaac referred to laughter. And in his lifetime he personified both these attributes.
John Isaac received his school education at Trinity College, Kandy (1930-40) and then entered the University of Ceylon in 1941 where he completed a General Arts degree.
Among his University acquaintances were my parents and two aunts, as well as the late Bishop Lakshman Wickremasinghe who was a few years his junior.
Above all, it was at University he met his future wife, Kamala JeyaRaj. Demure and calm by nature, she remained unruffled throughout by his vocal outbursts and his loud laughter.
Upon graduation John Isaac spent two decades as a school teacher. In February 1963 he and his wife very graciously consented to be my godparents at my baptism.
Later that year he began his studies for the priesthood. He was ordained as a clergyman in 1965 in the Kurunegala diocese of the Church of Ceylon (Anglican Church) where Lakshman Wickremasinghe was now his Bishop and employer.
He served at Christ Church, Matale first, then Christ Church Kandy (near the kachcheri) and later on at St. Paul’s Kandy. Matale provided an early test for the son of thunder in him.
There he punished an individual for trespassing. Observing this from a distance, his friend who was also a judge reminded him that his duty was to forgive, not chastise.
Years later, John Isaac ruefully recalled this episode, but then with a knowing smile added that here was a case of the priest doing the judge’s job of administering punishment and the judge doing the priest’s job of preaching forgiveness.
By the time John Isaac assumed duties in Kandy in 1973, his wife was already the principal at Mowbray Girls’ College. In 1975 his father, also the Rev. J.S. Isaac, who lived in retirement with the family, passed away. Some who read the obituary feared the worst for John Isaac.
A few hastened to the residence at Mowbray only to find him standing outside to receive them. The funeral procession caused the same confusion of identities; some who intended to join it on its way from the church to the cemetery saw, in amazement, the deceased person walking in the procession behind the hearse.
Letters of condolence arrived extolling his virtues which he read with glee. With tongue in cheek he wrote back that he was alive and well but the compliments were most welcome. Others confessed they had suspected it was a prank, but were all happy to know he was alive. And John Isaac laughed the loudest of all.
Yet, there was a profound side to John Isaac as well. He had a deep knowledge of scripture and it brought out the core of his own belief that one had to toil ceaselessly in the faith.
To him that was the price of discipleship. As part of his toil he would make his parish visits regularly. On one Christmas Eve he rode on his motorcycle near midnight from church to the home of a bed-ridden elderly parishioner to conduct watch-night service for that person, much to the appreciation of that household.
John Isaac was appointed a canon of the Kurunegala diocese in 1981 – a canon of the right calibre I quipped, quoting something I had read. Then two events occurred that affected him deeply.
In July 1983 the nation saw its worst racial unrest in decades and later that same year came the sudden demise of Bishop Lakshman Wickremasinghe. In 1984, John Isaac was appointed to the Board of Governors of his alma mater, Trinity College, which exhorted the virtue of peace within the borders giving him a sense of restoration.
He retired from Christ Church in 1992 and after that assisted in worship at St. Paul’s, Kandy. Many there will recall his invitation to “make your confessions loud and clear. The priest is not the only sinner here!” Needless to mention, he featured prominently at my wedding that year, preaching the homily as well.
In the remaining years John Isaac’s health began to fail and he passed away on July 20, 1996. There was a very impressive gathering at his funeral service: bishops, clergy and colleagues; family members and friends from all backgrounds filled the church.
Even as he entered the life eternal, the son of thunder in him would have been so touched by the final respects they paid; laughter, though, would not be far behind at the memories they once shared.
-Ananda Abayaratna
Malsiri Dias
She gave her time and love without measure
I came to know Aunty Malsiri several years ago when my family and I made our first contribution towards helping the Animal Welfare & Protection Association (AWPA).
This Association comprises of many energetic, devoted and caring individuals who work diligently to ensure that abandoned, injured and unwanted dogs and cats are given a place to live and a better chance at life. With two animal shelters in Dehiwala and Kahathuduwa, both filled to more than the maximum capacity with over 400 ‘inmates’, the AWPA has a monumental task on their hands trying to raise funds to maintain these shelters in order to provide for these canines and felines.
Over the years we got to know this amazing lady quite well. Though she had her own health problems, the animals at the shelters were her primary concern. Aunty Malsiri gave of her time, her energy and her love without measure.
Her own residence was a testament to what a great animal lover she was, for I have personally seen the dogs and cats she has rescued and brought up in her home. They were certainly lucky indeed.
When she was fitter and stronger, Sundays would find Aunty Malsiri at the shelters in Dehiwala and Kahathuduwa overseeing matters at the homes and taking time off to go as far as bathing and feeding the dogs (with support from other members) when health permitted.
There were instances when her doctors had advised her to rest and avoid exertion, but Aunty Malsiri refused to let health problems deter her from her cause because, as she once mentioned, “that is therapy for me.”
A lady with a strong will, sheer determination and a strong drive, she was synonymous with her work for the AWPA. Along with all the other commendable members of the Association, she strived to give our four-legged friends a voice, a home, a better life.
Their dedication opened our eyes to many things. When our Ridgeback/Doberman Jasper passed away in 2014, we decided to adopt dogs that were abandoned rather than buy a new pup from a pet store.
That act not only gave us a sense of joy but of fulfillment. The love and devotion we receive from our two naughty girls Chiko and LuLu is not diminished by the fact that they have no pedigree.
As if the antics of the dogs weren’t enough, our household now caters to the preening condescension of a Calico cat named Cleo, who was also abandoned. They have all found a home with us because we were given the opportunity to see what Aunty Malsiri saw in every soul she saved.
I am in awe of this lady. And it was with great sorrow that I learned of her demise. However, her generosity and devotion will continue to live on through the efforts of the AWPA.
And I salute the dedicated men and women who are committed to and passionate about this cause. It is a wonderful trait to feel compassion.
But it is even more rewarding to act on it and do something about it. That was Aunty Malsiri’s motto. A phrase that I read somewhere long ago resonates with me still, “Until one has loved and been loved by an animal, a part of one’s soul remains unawakened…”
-Sushara Liyanage
(If you would like to be a part of this great cause that was so dear to this lady’s heart, please contact Ms. Surangani De Silva on 0112587116 for membership and/or donations.)
Nimal Wirasekara
The man, the marketer and the musician
I met the Man in 2001 who eventually became my ‘boss’. There are many things that are remembered about people. But the most precious remembrances are the ones that are of a human being.
Nimal was an unforgettable character to many, especially to his staff. To his staff he was not only a boss but a friend who helped in numerous ways – from doing even little errands of picking things for them, to solving major crises.
His ‘Kiribath’ contribution to staff breakfast events was invariable, and always expected. There were many ways that he showed concern; never failed to inquire if the staff had their meals and how they got home after late night events.
I was always assured of a lift by Nimal, whenever needed, to my brother’s who lived close to his home.
Nimal was a Tsunami survivor. When the Tsunami hit, I particularly remembered him, as he had once driven with me by his wife’s home in the South. I was glad when he finally responded to my attempts to call.
He described his awful experience – ending saying: “somehow we managed to save our lives”. He and I both had cars of the same model for some time, and talking about cars often became an interesting point of conversation between us.
He made it a point to take me to show his car that got caught in the waves of the Tsunami. Nimal was a man who knew to connect with people in many interesting ways than one.
Nimal Wirasekera the Marketer was probably the most ‘incurable’ I have met. Advertising was one of his pet subjects. That was natural for him, being an artistic person.
He was probably the greatest supporter who powered the propagation of Marketing Education to all regions in Sri Lanka. North to South, East to West and in the hills Nimal travelled spreading the gospel of Marketing, which he always used to introduce as the central function of organisational success.
Very soon after I had met Nimal, the Musician in him struck a chord with me. Our conversations during the long journeys through various parts of Sri Lanka were filled with many humorous stories and anecdotes from his ‘band days’.
He always had time for music. Once after a long journey together he dropped in at my home for a cup of tea and seeing the piano he started playing it – some of the songs that we both liked.
It was a delight to see him back at the keyboards after his retirement; very definitely a man who let music bring joy to his life.
We will certainly miss Nimal. In Michael Jackson’s words yet another “gone too soon”. But the memory of this affable man, marketer, and musician will remain with us for much longer.
-L.T.
Col.G.H.M Suriyabandara and Irani Suriyabandara
My loving Appachchi and Ammi
-Peaceful Dreams-
The prayer of generations
For a night full of peaceful dreams
Content that they will wake up tomorrow
Peaceful dreams
Built on sacrifices of so many
Tears of those who loved them
The pain, the loss, the sound of guns
Now a fading memory
The war is finally over
Yet, not all fathers will come home…
Col. G.H.M.Suriyabandara was on active duty in the Sri Lanka Army when the MI 17 Helicopter he was travelling in went missing on January 22, 1996, with 39 passengers on board in the Northern part of the island.
He remains missing to-date. He meant the world to his darling wife Irani Suriyabandara who also passed away one year later on February 11, 1997 due to heart failure. They were my loving Appachchi and Ammi.
Thank you for teaching me how to love, giving me a secure childhood, a safe home and teaching me values that helped me build my life long after you both were gone.
-Your loving daughter,
Hansika Suriyabandara (Bunty)
Dr. Nisal T. Kurukulasuriya (BUNTY)
His gracious deeds and accomplishments will linger on
I was bewildered and dumbfounded to see the obituary notice on the internet of my venerable friend and acclaimed obstetrician and gynaecologist, Dr. Nisal T. Kurukulasuriya (Bunty) on the early morning of January 13, 2016.
According to the obituary, Bunty had passed away peacefully surrounded by his wife, children and grandchildren on December 21,2015 and had been cremated on the following day according to his wishes.
To relieve my anguish, I sent an email immediately to his beloved wife Dayaneetha, conveying my shock and profound sorrow to which she replied almost immediately.
“Dear Sunil, Thank you so much for your message. The children and I are devastated. I lost the love of my life and a wonderful husband and my best friend. He was a great father and grandfather.
We miss him so much. Sunil he was only 69. We had a very happy 45 years together. Bunty was diagnosed with cancer in 2014. We spent over 2 months in USA with our children and grandchildren and had a great time. We even celebrated his 69th birthday on 01 June 2015 in Boston.
He has done so much, for so many people, he did not suffer and that was the gift to him from the Gods above. He passed away peacefully with all the family around. Sunil, I looked up your e mail as I wanted to let you know because you were a sincere friend to him.”
My association with the now renowned Bunty commenced in the early 1960’s, over 56 years ago – we had grown up in the same neighbourhood in Mount Lavinia and been of a similar age.
Until the time of his untimely demise, we remained close friends. We were both instilled with the noble Buddhist precepts from an early age at the Daham Pasela of the Mallikaramaya Temple under the tutelage of the Venerable Weligama Gnaratna Anunayake Thera.
Bunty was a proud product of Royal College where he had an illustrious academic career coupled with a passion for cricket, having represented the College Cricket 1st X1 in 1964 with distinction and been awarded colours.
He was an all-rounder, a left arm “chinaman” exponent and left hand batsman who pulverised the Trinity College attack in Asgiriya prior to the traditional Royal -Thomian encounter, scoring a record swashbuckling double century.
He was a gifted cricketer who had an equal flair for any other sport like swimming, tennis, badminton and table tennis. Playing cricket did not deter his academic career as he was one of the best students at Royal. Having excelled in the GCE A/L in the Bio stream, he entered Medical College on his first attempt.
Bunty was the son of Charles and Alice Kurukulasuriya. He was the youngest in a family of five children.His father was an Assistant Superintendent of Mails at the Postal Department. In 1971, he married Dayaneetha, the younger daughter of former Chief Justice G.P.A.Silva and Mrs. Soma Silva.
In his inimitable way, he breezed through the Medical College and was recognised as one of the best students in his batch.A few years after completing Medical College, he proceeded to the UK.
He worked in several hospitals in England and Scotland; these include the Warrington Infirmary, Royal Infirmary Stirling, St.Mary’s Hospital, London and Hammersmith Hospital, London. He was a Fellow of the Royal College of Surgeons Edinburgh and a Fellow of the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists Great Britain.
Upon returning to Sri Lanka, Bunty worked as a Consultant in Obstetrics and Gynaecology at the De Soysa maternity hospital and the General Hospital in Colombo. Bunty was also a Senior Lecturer in Obstetrics and Gynaecology at the University of Colombo for approximately 10 years.
Under the guidance of titans in his field like Dr. A.M. Mendis, Prof. D. A. Ranasinghe, Prof. T. Visvanathan, Prof D.E. Gunatilleke and Prof.S.H.P. Nanayakkara, Bunty further honed his surgical and clinical prowess.From this enviable platform,he worked tirelessly and eventually rose to become an eminent and popular obstetrician and gynaecologist in his own right.
Apart from his work with patients in the wards, there was a terrific demand for him in the private sector. He cared for patients in his private practice largely at St. Michael’s and McCarthy.
He treated all his patients equally irrespective of their status, creed or religion. The attention and time each patient received during his ward rounds depended exclusively on the severity of the illness or how puzzling the clinical dilemma was. He had a remarkable aptitude of just looking at a patient and making a spot on diagnosis.
Bunty refused consultation fees from friends for his services and used to tell us not to waste time outside his consultation room, just show our face by peeping in, so that he could call us in. Similarly, he did so many operations sans his fees for many of his friends.
I myself had this experience in 1994 when he performed a hysterectomy on my wife and did not charge me although I was covered by an insurance scheme. We are indebted to him.
Perhaps of greater significance than all his professional achievements was his unwavering devotion and dedication to his wife, children and grandchildren.
He cultivated a unique and enduring bond with his sons and their families overseas, visiting them often. His doting daughter continued to live with him after marriage and named her son Nisal as a fitting tribute to her father whom she considered a mentor and living inspiration.
Moreover, a unique quality in Bunty from his formative years to the time of his passing was his low profile simplicity, very unassuming manner, his commitment and compassion and immense love for humanity.
He never accepted invitations to be Chief Guest or as attesting witnesses for weddings. My own experience of inviting him to act as attesting witness to my daughter’s marriage is testimony to this.
He did participate and told me that he prefers to maintain a low profile at these functions. All these unique character traits were abundantly demonstrated during his unblemished career for well over four decades.
Bunty retired from medical practice in 2010 to enjoy even more time with his family. He continued to read widely across many disciples including the Dhamma where his knowledge was extensive.
His family members, friends and patients will always remember with love and profound gratitude his deep commitment to his chosen calling, unparalleled skill and above all, his generous and compassionate nature.
All those who hear about his untimely passing would no doubt be grieved as there would never be another individual in the calibre of Bunty.
“The flower blossoms and fades. The sun rises and descends. But the memories, dignified and gracious deeds and accomplishments of Bunty would linger on, never to die away.”
Bunty’s passing has left his ever loving wife Dayaneetha, sons Nuwan and Channa, daughter Shalini and their spouses Ayesha, Erandi and Nikita and the grand children devastated.
It would be my fervent hope that his journey walking through sansara would be short until he attains the supreme bliss of Nirvana.
-Sunil Thenabadu