My Dear Navi Pillay, I am writing to you because you had announced this week that you would like to conduct an international inquiry into what happened during the final stages of the war against terrorism we won five years ago. I am slightly confused about all this, Navi, so I thought it is best [...]

 

5th Column

Polemical play of Navi Pillay

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My Dear Navi Pillay,
I am writing to you because you had announced this week that you would like to conduct an international inquiry into what happened during the final stages of the war against terrorism we won five years ago. I am slightly confused about all this, Navi, so I thought it is best that I ask you to clarify these matters.
Now, don’t get me wrong, Navi, I am sure you are a very fair minded, unbiased person. So, when you ask our country to have all these inquiries conducted by an ‘international’ panel, I am sure you would use the same yardstick on other countries in the world too, be they big or small, weak or powerful.

I think you must also be a very busy person which is why, while you were so busy touring Sri Lanka last year and preparing the groundwork for the ‘inquiry’ that you have just called for, you seem to have forgotten or overlooked more serious events happening elsewhere on our planet.I am sure you are not aware of this, Navi, but the Americans — yes, the same people who want this inquiry on Sri Lanka — are also busy sending drones to regions in Pakistan and Afghanistan which kill people, some of them civilians, on a regular basis.

I am sure they forgot to mention that to you when they were lobbying for your support to have an inquiry against Sri Lanka. But, as I said, I am sure you are a very fair minded, unbiased person so I know you will now rush to call for an inquiry into these war crimes committed by the Americans. Navi, I heard that last week you had also said you wanted our Prevention of Terrorism Act repealed so that there would be no ‘arbitrary detentions’. I am sure no one told you, Navi, in our country thousands of former terrorists who had been detained under this Act have now been rehabilitated and released.

While we are on this subject of arbitrary detention, Navi, I thought I would mention a place called Guantanamo Bay. I am not sure how well they taught you geography when you were a schoolgirl in South Africa, but this place is actually in Cuba, though being run by the United States military. While you are globetrotting trying to find all these places where there is ‘arbitrary detention’, do drop in to Guantanamo Bay. I am sure your good friends, the Americans, would allow you unlimited access to this camp — the kind of access that you had, when you visited our country. Then tell us what you think, Navi.

Then there are these other chaps who are pushing for a resolution against us, the lapdogs of the Americans, the British. I thought I should tell you about them, too, as you are quite keen about this ‘war crimes’ business, because they waged war in Iraq ten years ago because the Americans wanted them to. I admire the British sense of humour, Navi, because they are quite funny indeed. These chaps, who are demanding ‘transparent’ and ‘international’ inquiries from us conducted an inquiry into their Iraq war but its report — the Chilcott report — is being kept under wraps, because the Americans don’t want it released.

But as I said, the British are a funny lot. Their Prime Minister, that Cameron chap, was here for the Commonwealth Summit asking about our human rights record in the last few months of the war, when we should have been asking him about how his country violated our human rights for over a hundred years!
But, Navi, I am sure you are a very fair minded, unbiased person. So when you ask for your ‘war crimes’ inquiry be sure to make sure you include the entire 26 years of the war instead of the last four or five months. That way, we can have a full and proper inquiry and tell you about who supported our war.

We can tell you how terrorists who blew up trains, aircraft and banks are now citizens in the very countries which are sponsoring resolutions against us. And I am sure you will reprimand them and bring the likes of Adele, now living in Britain, swiftly to justice!

Despite what many people say about you, Navi, I do have confidence in you. Since you are a very fair minded, unbiased person, I am sure you will see to it that justice is not only done, it will also appear to be done. After all, you don’t want to be seen as being biased because of your ethnicity, do you?

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha
PS: Even though you are quite vocal about what happens in Sri Lanka, Navi, I didn’t hear you utter a word about Jayalalithaa’s decision to set free those who killed their Prime Minister. Surely, as the world’s leading human rights advocate, you wouldn’t want that? Or is that you and Jayalalithaa have something in common?

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