Average Joe
Average Joe – Hit me, baby, one more time?

Yes, ma'am! Gladly! I'll hit you all the way back to the Mickey Mouse Club where you can strangle Christina until she chokes, and slit Mr. J. Timberlake's wrist for good measure. Oh but, wait… on second thoughts, spare those two, because they can actually sing. Too bad I can't say the same about you…
The late '90s and early 2000's were all about boybands, all-girl groups and wannabe superstars like Britney Spears. They were idolised by millions of teenage girls AND boys (what the hell were they thinking?) all over the world. They had many talents. They could act all cool and pretend to be the next best thing after sliced bread. Some of them could even sing…

"My heart will go on, but quit playing games with it, OK? As long you love me, I'll be there for you; or else, it's Bye Bye Bye," the catchphrases during the turn of the millennium. Vomit inducing at best…
So they came, sang, danced and….went…

But unfortunately for us, people like Britney who refused to believe she was simply NOT another Madonna in the making, decided to stay on, forcing their "music" down our throats. The media too was only too eager to create a nonexistent mega hype about it so they could make some extra cash by selling rubbish.

Yep, rubbish it was, rubbish it is, and rubbish it will always be. OK, I'll stop ranting. On a serious note, boybands and lame singers were a cultural phenomenon those days, and it was a thriving subculture in our paradise isle too, just like it was in many other Asian countries. People were so engrossed by it they had CR books full of song lyrics, posters and whatnot. The memory of it still sends a shudder down my spine.

A typical conversation during a meeting of peers after school wouldn't last for ten minutes without mentioning Nick Carter's girly hair or his girly voice.
Argh, the agony…

I'm just gonna stop talking about this now, or else I might end up offending a lot of people out there… So Plato's Girl will take it on from here…

Enter Plato's Girl – Awww, Nick Carter…

OK, maybe I don't go awww anymore, but there definitely was a time when all of us used to be so awed by him and his boys… I myself had a host of their posters all over my wall. Oh, and I also had an eight page poster of Nicky Boy which I got by "sacrificing" my oh-so-precious poster of Jack (Mr. Leo DeCaprio himself).

What a sight in the morning! (Average Joe is pretending to throw up). Going back to the 90's, massive song books were the "in" thing those days. We used to cut out lyrics and pictures of our favourite, darling pop stars from newspapers and magazines and fill entire books with them. (What a waste of paper, my writing partner says).

The Backstreet boys were a peculiar kind. Girls practically hero-worshipped Nick Carter, the green-eyed blonde. Then there was Brian, Howie D, AJ and…err…who was that fifth one…ah, Kevin. Backstreet's Back was a hit.

That was when those boys were on the top of the charts, but then surely, as one could have predicted, they seem to have faded off from the scene.

They broke apart, if we are not mistaken. But they were hanging in there somewhere, but not as boy-bandish as they were once. (Yep, their voices have cracked; they actually sound masculine now according to Average Joe).

Ah, Peter Andre and his mysterious girl… Hanson's Mmmbop tick a ta ba do and many many more… Oh and Westlife, N-Sync, Spice Girls, Boyzone, Atomic Kitten, Aqua… the chart toppers at the time.

They played a balancing game. Some played it well and the industry was more than happy with them but those who couldn't and wouldn't play this game…well, there's nothing much to say about them, they just faded away with the music.

We, as a society are partly responsible for this rubbish, as they say. We (maybe not you and I), but certain sections of society such as the media, need such celebrities. It's an industry out there and all is done for money.

Celebrities know this and they cater to that need. They need us and we need them. For us young ones in Sri Lanka, Smash Hits (remember that?) was something we always looked forward to. And Most Wanted with Shanaz, (surely you've sent those lovely requests to her?) and MTV Select with Nikhil…
And this was also the time where there were no iPods, and internet was a privilege enjoyed by a few…there were walkmans, the old, big ones…

Yes, there was such a time… But we have moved on, but some people do not even want to admit that they used to listen to these songs too. Sad…