5th Column

My dear Uncle Ranil, Rajitha and Rathana hamuduruwo,

I didn’t think I will be writing to all of you in one letter. I am doing so because the three of you have something in common: you have been detained into custody over the past few days. The reasons for that are different, but it does seem as if the wheels of justice are now turning at breakneck speed!

Uncle Ranil, you have had a rollercoaster ride in the last week. You were first interrogated about some expenses on a trip to Britain, arrested, refused bail and remanded, hospitalised, sent to the ICU and finally granted bail. Now, we are told that you have made a miraculous recovery and returned home.

Your detention brought most of the opposition to one table. How else would you see Sagara, Thalatha, Harin, Namal, Champika, GL, Nimal, Dayasiri and Maithri seated together? Their banner said ‘Lets defeat constitutional dictatorship’ but Dayasiri called it right, as a battle of the ‘elite and the non-elite’.

Still, Uncle Ranil, hearing the submissions of your lawyers the other day in court, we feared for your health. They painted a grim picture of someone very ill, providing minute details of how poor your health was. You wouldn’t be able to return to politics if you are so unwell, they made us believe.

The court said it is acting on the assumption that the medical opinion about you was correct and granted bail.  Maybe that was what was needed for your health to pick up. Just a few days later, you are at home and no doubt plotting your next move on how to make the maximum of what happened.

Why, even Sajith, who didn’t attend the media briefing held to show solidarity with you, visited you daily in hospital. So, some are talking about the Greens and the ‘telephone’ chaps finally getting together. Others are suggesting that you should get someone to resign and return to Parliament.

Knowing you, Uncle Ranil, I know you won’t let this opportunity pass. Two people will be having nightmares as a result. Sajith must be wondering what his plight would be if you made a comeback. Namal baby on the other hand will be dreading the day the green and ‘telephone’ chaps unite.

Rajitha, as Uncle Ranil was heading home, you were going in the opposite direction. Honestly, it was disappointing to see you play hide and seek with the Police like Deshabandu. We had hoped to see more courage from someone like you who has been in the rough and tumble of politics for so long.

We know consistency is not your virtue, Rajitha. You began your political journey with Vijaya and Satellite, but have been with Uncle Ranil, Mahinda maama, Maithri and Sajith. The last we heard, you were with Uncle Ranil again. With such a track record, you would have thought you were always safe.

The only people you haven’t been with are the rathu sahodarayas and the ‘maalimaawa’ chaps. Since we are now being told that the law is equal to everyone, I suppose it wouldn’t have made a difference. That principle remains to be tested, though. Maybe the engineer in the ‘maalimaawa’ will test it soon!

As for you, Rathana hamuduruwo, You were also called ‘Athana Methana Rathana’ because of your changing loyalties. Recently however, the question was ‘Rathana kothanada?’ because the Police couldn’t locate you after another in saffron robes accused you of kidnapping and detaining him.

These are serious charges. It is alleged that you did that to ensure you were nominated to the single National List seat won by your party at the general election five years ago. To make matters worse, it is alleged Deshabandu was involved too. Of course, you are entitled to the presumption of innocence.

Unfortunately, Rathana hamuduruwo, your history works against you because you have been involved in so many controversies. You were at the forefront of the campaign against Dr Shafie which has now been proved to be a hoax. And didn’t Maithri mention you about pardoning the Royal Park murderer?

Rajitha and Rathana hamuduruwo, difficult days are ahead for you. You are still presumed innocent, but you won’t like being in remand either. Rajitha, you must ask young Chatura to mind his language and not make matters worse. As for you, hamuduruwo, this will test your belief about ‘karma’.

Uncle Ranil, I won’t wish you a speedy recovery because you seem to have achieved that already. I am wondering how you managed to do all that you did over the past few years, with your life hanging by a thread, if we are to believe your doctors and lawyers. We are awaiting your next move.

Yours truly,

Punchi Putha

PS: Rajitha, you have retained Uncle Ranil’s lawyer. That’s smart. Maybe Rathana hamuduruwo and you should retain his doctors as well. We must also ban people going overseas for medical treatment. Why should they, when our doctors can cure critically ill patients with just a few days in the ICU?