Columns - Talk at the Cafe Spectator

Silva's suicide bombers and the hotline

Sixty-seven-year-old Hewa Koparage Mervyn Silva, Cabinet Minister in charge of Public Co-ordination and Public Affairs, dropped a bombshell whilst on camera a few days ago. He warned UN Secretary General Ban Ki-moon and Marzuki Darusman, chairman of his Advisory Panel that probed alleged war crimes in Sri Lanka, that they should be careful.

Silva said he had a trained team of 25 suicide killers. That is not all. He said that the Chairman of the UN Panel, Indonesia's former Attorney General Darusman, was not born to human parents. He was the child of a beast.

(His remarks in Sinhala can be viewed on the following You Tube link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuPZXHvd1io&feature=share).

Silva's outburst reminds one of the story of an American who had reportedly called a "suicide hotline" in California and told them he was depressed and on the verge of killing himself. These hotlines have been set up throughout the United States primarily to advise and dissuade would-be suiciders. But unfortunately for the guy, this particular hotline, so the story goes, had been outsourced to a call centre in Pakistan.

So, when the American said he was contemplating suicide, the Pakistani guy, probably with ties to al-Qaeda or the Taliban, had sounded overjoyed and asked the American: "but can you drive a truck?."

Raja hits world headlines for wrong reasons

The conviction of the Sri Lankan-born hedge fund billionaire Raj Rajaratnam was the biggest news story of the day splashed across the front pages of virtually all the leading newspapers and televisions in the United States last Thursday.

Rajaratnam, 53, had the dubious distinction of being the only Sri Lankan who earned a banner headline in the front page of the New York Times. Perhaps he is the first, and hopefully the last.

The headline was spread across six columns with a five column picture of an unsmiling Rajaratnam who is facing at least 25 years in jail for fraudulent insider trading. His lawyer said Rajaratnam would appeal his conviction. But the chances of escaping jail are remote.

If the conviction stands, he will not only be thrown in the slammer but will also have to pay hundreds of millions of dollars as restitution for the crimes committed. Since he is considered a flight risk, possibly, fleeing to Sri Lanka, the court ordered home detention and electronic monitoring of his movement, plus the confiscation of his passport. If the appeal is turned down, he will be sentenced on July 29.

Rajaratnam is an old boy of S. Thomas' College, Mt. Lavinia and an alumnus of the prestigious Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania. He has had contact with several leading Sri Lankan politicians, past and present as well.

Who birdied Tiger dinner?

The much-awaited event by members of the Royal Colombo Golf Club (RCGC) for a dinner with golf legend Tiger Woods on Tuesday has been postponed.

An SMS message sent out said: "Once in a life time opportunity to meet the best golfer in the world for a small fee of US 1,000. Tiger Woods would like to host a limited number of golfers for a 'Black tie' dinner on the 17th May.

Pls confirm - with Mahinda Secretary; funds will be donated for the promotion of Golf".
But an SMS received yesterday by the members said: "As per informed the Tiger Woods event has been postponed".

A spokesman for the club confirmed that the event has been put off. Word spread in Colombo that Tiger Woods, whose mother is a Buddhist, was expected in Sri Lanka in connection with the 2600 Sambuddhathva Jayanthi celebrations.

GL's Nonis envoy to Britain

Christopher Nonis, chairman of a leading mercantile firm and a close friend of External Affairs MinisterG.L. Peiris is tipped to become Sri Lanka's new High Commissioner in Britain, according to sources in the corridors of Republic Square where the Foreign Office is housed.

If appointed, he will succeed former Supreme Court judge Nihal Jayasinghe who ended his term of duty some months ago.

Rival rallies in Britain

A so-called British Tamil Forum has obtained permission from the Metropolitan Police for an anti-Sri Lanka protest on May 18 though it is a working day.

The group is calling itself the "Mullaivaikal Remembrance Day 2011" and has invited the Tamil residents in London to take part.

However, other Sri Lankan groups are planning to hold Victory Day celebrations on May 19 - the day on which Tiger guerrillas were militarily defeated.

Patten asks, where's Pradeep?

Lord Patten (formerly Chris Patten, the former Chairman of the British Conservative Party, ex-Governor of Hong Kong and Chancellor of the Oxford University) has raised a question on Sri Lankan cartoonist (of Lanka e-news) Prageeth Ekneligoda's whereabouts.

He asked "Her Majesty's Government," further to the written answer by Lord Howell of Guildford on March 28, whether they have received any further news concerning Prageeth Ekneligoda; and which are the civil society organisations with whom they have held discussions.

The Minister of State, Foreign and Commonwealth Office (Lord Howell of Guildford) responded: "Unfortunately there is no further news on the whereabouts and welfare of missing journalist Prageeth Ekneligoda. Our High Commissioner raised media freedom issue with the Sri Lankan Foreign Minister in March and we continue to engage with a wide range of civil society organisations to discuss concerns on human rights.

"In our 2010 Human Rights and Democracy Report (www.fco.gov.uk/en/global-issues/human-rights/around-the-world/human-rights-report) Sri Lanka is listed as a country of concern. The report highlights areas of progress, as well as challenges that remain".

Father barred from daughter's graduation

When United National Party (UNP) General Secretary Tissa Attanayake and Parliamentarian Jayalath Jayawardena visited the Welikade Prison to see former General Sarath Fonseka, he was bathing. They waited.

Later, Mr. Jayawardena told Mr. Fonseka that a representative of the Inter-Parliamentary Union (IPU) would arrive in Colombo to monitor court cases against him.

Replied Fonseka, "My daughter is graduating this week. As a father, I wanted to witness that. But I am here though I defeated terrorism."

Fonseka's quip on cutouts

Former Army Commander Sarath Fonseka is now well known for his remarks on the sidelines whenever he is brought to courts for the many cases against him.

On May 2, the big news story all over the world was that US Navy seal commandos had killed al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden. "There were no cutouts of President Barack Obama in the streets of Washington DC when it happened," declared Fonseka.

Sex suspect in charge of maids

The External Affairs Ministry is buzzing with reports of a one-time diplomat in a far off country. He was recalled for misdemeanours including alleged sexual misconduct.

Insiders now say that the man is to be placed in charge of a top slot at the EAM where he will deal with thousands and thousands of maids.

Holy Hudson

The Ananda Samarakoon Studio at the Sri Lanka Broadcasting Corporation (SLBC) was the venue for the release of a CD containing speeches of Muslim leaders. Among those present were Ministers Rauff Hakeem and A.H.M. Fowzie and Western Province Governor Alavi Moulana.

In his speech, SLBC chief Hudson Samarasinghe said he believed in the virtues of all religions. He said he would wish to visit the birthplace of Jesus Christ in Bethlehem and spend a month there. Similarly, he would like to go to Mecca, the birth place of Prophet Muhammad and live there for a month.

Mr. Moulana, who spoke after Mr. Samarasinghe referred to the SLBC Chairman's wish to go to Mecca. "If he still wants to go to Mecca, we may have to do a change in him," declared Moulana triggering loud laughter from those present. Only Muslims can go to Mecca after all.

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