Sweet Bitter gourd and Bitter Sugar
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At the age of 22, back when I was in Australia, I had a relationship with a beautiful Australian girl named Jewel, as her name depicts, she was actually as beautiful as a jewel.
Life seemed so fascinating that I almost lost focus of the priorities in life. I began to deviate from my higher studies as well as my job, due to the relationship with Jewel. The only craving of my five senses was to be with her. Eventually it was revealed that she was married and she had lied to me regarding her relationship status.
My dreams were shattered in the blink of an eye. Contemplating on what happened to me led me in to depression. Life on earth can become extremely deceitful if you choose wrong. It is essential to be ‘Wise’ rather than ‘Emotional’. The doorway to many destructive things may look beautiful and seem pleasurable whilst conducive things may seem bitter and unattractive.
Both my children do not like to eat bitter gourd, when I ask them why they don’t like it, they say it’s because bitter gourd is too bitter. My wife explained to them that even though it is bitter to their taste palate, it is one of the sweetest medicines to their body. On the other hand, I told them even though chocolate is very sweet to their taste palate it is equally harmful to their body.
My wife also told our children that their grandmother is suffering with diabetics because of the excessive consumption of sugar. Bitter gourd tastes bitter, but ultimately you will attain good health, likewise the taste of chocolate is sweet, but at the end you will attract only bitterness to your body.
What we choose in life should be based on our long-term objectives and not merely on temporary satisfaction. Many have fallen into the trap of contracting HIV-Aids simply because they have chosen to feed their temporary desires.
Patience always seems bitter even though its rewards are constantly very sweet. Likewise, even though junk food is mouthwatering, at the very moment you consume junk food it does not showcase the painful feeling a heart attack causes. Alcohol and drugs may help you to forget your worries momentarily, but at the moment of consumption they do not depict the misery of cirrhosis and death. When I advise people that pure reality, they tend to say that I am rough and tough. It is not that I am rough and tough, it simply means that the truth that I reveal is bitter and difficult to digest.
If I tell them that what they are doing is correct, as human beings, they will obviously say that I am a good-hearted man. However, I will be condemned by my conscious if I do not reveal the truth to them. If they fall in trouble, then my conscious will yell at me, holding me responsible for any wrong doing.
Take a piece of paper, on the left-hand side list down your selection of music, dramas you watch, food you eat, books you read, the relationships you have and everything you are connected with. On the right-hand side list down the benefits, you gain out of it. Moreover, note down if they are based on temporary satisfaction or if they are satisfying and beneficial in the long term. Guide your children to groom their style of thinking accordingly. Continuing the same style of thinking over a period of time makes it our default thought patterns. The friends who offered me heroine was not with me when I was admitted to the National Mental Hospital in Angoda. Only my innocent father was with me with a flood of tears in his eyes. The chocolates you consume with great delight will be prohibited to you when you are suffering with diabetics.
The destructive pleasure you obtain out of an illicit relationship will crash on you the day your loving wife and children will leave you because they can’t stand it anymore. The painful part of the sweetest yet bitter things in life is that they will never be with you or prohibit you when you are going through the valley of suffering. There is a famous saying that “If you do not take your food like medicine, then you will have to take your medicine as food”.
I know of a 32 year old man who is always unrealistic in his approach towards life. He used to watch 2-3 unrealistic Hindi Films a day since he was very young, which he continued for many constant years. His mind has been continuously fed with unrealistic stories that it expects real life scenarios also to be alike. Which is not the case.
You become what you think therefore you must be very careful of your thoughts. You are the owner of your self-control unit “The Mind”, you acquire the ability to either encourage or discourage the thoughts which set foot at the gateway to your mind.
If you happen to close your doors at night, then the enemy cannot enter your house, but if you leave your doors wide open, then anybody could easily enter your house and attack you. Therefore, make it a point to open and close the doorway to your mind based on the long-term objectives that you receive in life rather than the temporary gains which your five senses tempt you to have.
Be mindful of the music and drama you expose yourself to, as they retain the possibility to sow corruptible seeds in your mind. I have prohibited my children from watching certain TV channels in my house, as they implant garbage in to the raw minds of my innocent children. Since innocent, unblemished minds are vulnerable they can easily be attacked, therefore we must be very careful in guiding our children on the correct path. I also discourage certain relatives from visiting my house, as they are just dilly-dalliers who gossip and discriminate others characters.
I play many roles in life such as being a Husband, Father, Son, CEO, Trainer, Lecturer, Consultant etc. Hence, I do not have time to waste on other people’s dramas. I am sure you would also dislike investing your precious time and thoughts on other people’s dramas, when you have enough and more to deal with in your life.
Life consists of many chapters, do not try to skip one chapter because of your impatience to go through the process of beginning the next.
A tree cannot complain that it does not like to go through the phase of being a growing plant just because it is difficult and time consuming. It cannot become a fruit bearing tree straightaway. It does not happen in that manner. Likewise learn the process of life and train yourself to adapt to the reality. In conclusion I would like to remind you that the bitterest bitter gourd is sweet whereas the sweetest chocolate maybe bitter.
For comments: e-mail –
philipnehri@chandanalepa.lk / voice – 0779526496