Connecting people and bringing joy to them and others
View(s):The foursome is thrilled with their handiwork. “It was incredibly nice to be able to help someone,” they say. “If we could do it again we definitely would.” We’re speaking to four youngsters from the Overseas School of Colombo who have just helped a mother reconnect with the son she had given up for adoption years ago. Anargi Jayakody, Divyanshi Patel, Jiwon Jeong and Dae Hyung Yoo have seen the power of the internet unfold right before their eyes and say the experience has taught them a thing or two about reaching out.
The students with their teachers at OSC and iamsrilanka team. Pic by Susantha Liyanawatte
It all began when they were tasked with carrying out individual and group acts of community work and research for a class in school. While embarking on their individual acts of kindness (they donated supplies to several homes and spent time with the residents), the group began researching on inequalities, and focused especially on reasons why parents abandon their children. What they realized was that the situation was not as black and white as they might have thought it was-“we found out that a major reason for kids being given up for adoption by their parents was financial difficulties,” says 11-year-old Anargi.
Somewhere along the way, a teacher-Tassy Dahlan shared a story with them about a maid she knew who had given up her son for adoption due to a similar situation. “We learned that Surangi-the lady who had given her son up-did so because she was unable to support her child financially,” says Divyanshi, 10. Curious, they obtained the bare bones of the story from Surangi and embarked on a fact finding mission online. They came across an article published previously by the Sunday Times about a young girl’s journey to find her mother, and were interested to note that a group called Iamsrilanka was a major part of the process. “We wrote to Mr. Shiraz Ismail who heads the movement,” says Jiwong, 11. “He wrote back and said he would help us.”
Shiraz, on his end, was pleasantly surprised to be contacted by a group of youngsters and immediately put the wheels in motion, obtaining the son’s name (withheld here for privacy) and country of adoption (Sweden) to start the investigation.
It didn’t take too long. The son was easily found on social media; for it turned out that he was somewhat a celebrity in his country of adoption. “He’s a race car driver!” beams Dae Hyung. Initially, the group were disquieted to learn of an accident the son had been involved in, and not knowing his condition were reluctant to carry on further inquiries. “We let Shiraz handle the task of connecting with the son for us because we didn’t want to intrude on his personal space,” shares Divyanshi. Her friends agree-“imagine what a shock it must have been anyway to be contacted about your birth mother!”
Eventually, they established contact (with some relief, after finding out that he was perfectly fine) and after several attempts were successful in garnering a response. Their teacher Tassy first wrote an email on behalf of Surangi, who was beside herself at the thought of contacting her long lost son. “I would have never given him up if not for my situation,” she explains. Surangi’s husband left her while she was pregnant with her second child; with barely enough means to look after her first, she decided to give this son up for adoption. “I wanted a better life for him,” she says simply. In her email, she explained all this, and asked if he was angry with her for letting him go. “If he was angry I wouldn’t have been able to bear it,” she says. ‘But I would have understood, too.”
Her son wrote back with a great deal more warmth than she expected. He was not angry, he was quick to explain. He had been brought up wanting for nothing by his adoptive parents and now had a successful career and life. In the email he included some photos for Surangi as well. “I was so happy,” she laughs. The students who helped her are like “little angels”, she says. “I’m thankful to them every day for helping me connect with my son.”
They share her joy, yet can’t help feeling a little sad for her as well. “I wish she could meet her son one day,” says Divyanshi. The others agree, but say that they still feel successful and are grateful for the support from their teachers, parents and the team from Iamsrilanka. “I would like to keep helping others,” shares Anargi and her friends echo this sentiment. They’ll never forget Surangi’s tears of joy at finding out about her son. -D.I