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4th April 1999

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Why is it that no one cares?

End the war and start talking, say Parents for Peace

By Kumudini Hettiarachchi

"They told me my only son, Priyanka, had gone missing on a flight between Palali and Vettilaikerni. He was ferrying more than 39 men in his aircraft. But there was no oil spill. There was nothing, not even a shoe or a piece of shirt to indicate that there had been a crash.

"When we heard the news my daughter-in-law was three months pregnant. Now their son is two and a half years old. The little boy does not know his father and my son does not know he has a little son. Why is it that no one cares?"

Parents for Peace: rising above communityYes, why are we deaf to such anguished cries of mothers and fathers, wives and sisters and brothers? Why don't we listen, why don't we care? Is it because our loved ones have not suffered, been maimed, killed or simply gone missing? Missing is the key word. It's easy to say, with a shrug of the shoulders. Politicians mouth it with ease. But do we accept it? The time has come to say that taking the easy way out is not good enough.

That's just what a newly formed group called "Parents for Peace" are planning to do. Parents for Peace will hold a day's satyagraha opposite the Fort railway station and go on a signature campaign. They will later submit the petition with at least 100,000 signatures to the President and the government. They are also hoping to go on a "pada yatra" (peace walk) to Jaffna soon. These parents have a simple appeal - stop the war and start talking. And they have a stake in it too. All of them have a loved one who is missing and that is also the reason why they have risen above community.

As Mrs. K.L.L. Weeraman stresses, "A mother's love is the same whether the mother is Sinhalese or Tamil. I know what it is, therefore, I feel what any other mother would feel. I know because Priyanka has been missing since January 1996."

The stories told at a meeting the group had with the press on Tuesday, though similar were heart-rending. For 23-year-old Nalika Sajjath and her little son with milk bottle in hand there is hope. Her husband had gone missing after the Tiger attack on Mullaitivu, but subsequently started writing to her through the International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC).

So she knows he's alive. But for Mrs. E.P. Nanayakkara there is only the word of a naval captain who had also been in Tiger captivity. A shadow of pain clouds her eyes as she recalls the day the bad news was conveyed to them. "Sudarshana went missing on January 20, 1997. He had been sent in a Whitewell personnel carrier to investigate a ship that was supposed to be bringing arms for the LTTE from Thailand."

"The moment we heard the news, his grandmother suffered a stroke and became paralysed and his sister who was expecting a baby had a miscarriage. But now Captain Janaka Thenuwara tells us that he saw my son in an LTTE camp."

For Capt. Thenuwara it has been a long and difficult road to come to the conclusion that everyone should be equal. He had joined the navy in 1984 and had been involved in many operations in the north. Later he left the navy and joined the merchant navy and in 1997 was captured by the LTTE and put in chains. He was angry with the Tigers. He wanted to kill them and kill himself. But he saw how the Tamil people suffered. They didn't have food, they didn't have clothes and they couldn't engage in their work. How could they live? He discussed with his LTTE guards and came to realise that it was important to hold peace talks.

Sudarshana's father, E.P. Nanayakkara agrees. People not involved in the war including the Maha Sangha and the "winter birds", those expatriates who come to Sri Lanka just to get away from the cold, urge that we should continue the war. But what have they contributed towards it? What have they sacrificed? Nothing. But we, who have given our children, have a right to say that the war should be stopped, he says.

Even, the other side, the LTTE and Tamil youth are suffering. It's just not only our side. Recently the LTTE has indicated to Professor Tissa Vitharne (a government science advisor and peace broker) and Vajira Thera that they don't want Eelam, they want only to live as equal citizens, he said.

The bitterness is evident, and justifiably so, when A.B. Siyambalagoda talks of what occurred after his son went missing in Mullaitivu. Relating the callousness of politicians, he said, "I and several mothers whose sons were missing met this high politician to ask for news about our loved ones. Without any emotion, the politician claimed that more than a thousand died at Mullaitivu. Had he forgotten that our sons fought until the bitter end there?"

"He also waved his hand in dismissal and said they had reports that the Tigers lined up several soldiers and shot them dead. Why do they talk like that?"

Their main plea is, without talking of elections and other trivial matters "do something about our loved ones."

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