16th November 1997

This deadly thing called grapevine

By Kshalini Nonis

The Oxford diction ary describes a 'gossip' as a person who habitually indulges in idle conversation especially the spreading of rumours, 'tittle tattle', informal or unrestrained talk, particularly about people or social incidents.

However, the definition of a 'gossip' in Sri Lanka encompasses much more. Gossip which occurs in our society is often malicious, slanderous.......that which could literally 'kill' a person, titbits which are generally blown out of proportion, liberally sprinkled with sugar, salt, pepper.....

Ironically, we find many complaining that with the hectic pace of life today, there is very little time to pay one a social visit, or even call another up. But it is these very people who indulge in idle talk. Gossiping is virtually a favourite pastime to many who very often gather at various clubs, homes, gyms, coffee mornings etc.

Let's take a typical conversation between such persons:

Ms Colombo 7: "Did you hear that Ramona's daughter is having over 1000 guests for her wedding at the Hilton and everything is being flown down from Paris? Her bridal dress is being made by one of the leading designers in New York and they are even giving gifts to the guests as a souvenirs. What a waste of money.

"My daughter's wedding will be at the Trans Asia. Of course we will have about 750 guests....but I am sure they are having the wedding purely for the 'name' you know, and to boast.....

"After all you know how they got rich so quickly don't you? Neela said that she told you.

"That rascal Thilak.....doing so many underhand deals! But did you hear that Shani's fiancee in Los Angeles is said to be already married to some Mexican woman......purely for convenience to get his green card?

Ms. Colombo 3: "Aiyo! No men, can't be. Thushan is not a boy like that............Then again you never know what these young fellows are upto once they leave the country! You know, I heard from a very reliable source that Shani has not been very faithful to Thushan either! Aney......what is this world coming to? I will be meeting Ramona today, I must ask her all this...... and whether that Mexican woman is also coming for the wedding. It might very well happen you know-there goes that little bit of sugar' n spice... certainly not all that is nice!!"

Then let's take a recent example, for instance the October bomb blast in Fort. In reality, only the Hilton and Galadari Hotels suffered intense damage and less than 200 people were injured........But yes, the gossip mongers were at work! Initially the phone lines were jammed-maybe out of a sense of security, to inquire whether one's loved ones are safe. But the stories that followed......were indeed interesting. When the 'news' reached a third or fourth party, all the hotels in Fort had been severely damaged, the boutiques in the area reduced to ashes, whilst over 500 people were in a critical condition!!

So what then are the sociological reasons for people gossiping? According to Senior Lecturer in Sociology at the University of Colombo, Dr. A.J. Weeramunda, gossip is a form of informal communication among homogeneous social groups, with the intention of evoking a response by way of moral judgment or condemnation. Moreover, those who engage in this idle talk, he says, often consider themselves to be 'puritans'!

The subject of this talk would be something that arouses one's curiosity. For example people are less inclined to talk about a miraculous cure for cancer but would rush to express their outrage at the moral behaviour of a person or group of persons.

Indeed according to anthropological studies, gossip is something that has come down the ages among small groups of people, mainly in the absence of a formal means of transmitting information. Hence they depend on hearsay. This is a functional means of exchanging information.

The other side of the coin, according to Dr. Weeramunda is when this type of 'news' creates conflict, tension and disharmony among a given social group- all this being the mechanics of gossip. At this stage ones prejudices, emotions etc are involved and stories tend to get distorted.

Psychologically, it conforms to one's already existing mental condition and people believe and act on this 'misinformation' although there maybe hardly any truth in it.

Why then do people gossip? Dr. Weeramunda feels that in modern society the 'legitimate' information people receive is stifled and most of it is censored. Thus they have no option but to depend on information which may not be legitimate but yet be dependable.

He also went onto say that in small societies this idle talk is a means of social control when one does something against the existing ethical codes. "For instance, a boss may take his secretary out for lunch. When others see them entering a hotel and coming back to the office many stories may be spread. This is a means of objective control, as the 'puritans' believe that the relationship between the boss and secretary should be purely official."

On the other hand, malicious gossip is that which is invented out of the blues, fabricated and even scandalous in certain instances. The most distinctive quality about such gossip according to Dr. Weeramunda is that it is focused on other people.

Furthermore, there are class and sex barriers regarding gossip. Women in rural areas will gather close to a river or well and perhaps talk about the occurrences in their village whereas the elite will meet at social clubs and discuss topics such as dances, the latest fashions etc.

Usually men's gossip involves sexual connotations, he said.

Dr. Weeramunda added that it is indeed the middle classes that tend to gossip more.

"They see it as a means of attacking the other classes who do not have much leisure like them. The upper classes will find ways to spend their leisure time whereas the lower classes will be too occupied trying to make ends meet," he said.

Indeed those who gossip operate on a strong network which is initially restricted to those they associate with. Thereafter, the stories are spread in various forms, with the 'initiator's this idle talk being 'invisible'.

Gossip is therefore not something new, but rather an informal means of spreading 'news', much of which is distorted and factually incorrect.

Talking about others is not a crime, but virtually killing one's reputation is indeed malicious. People should not believe everything they hear down the grapevine and we would all do well to realize that there are always two sides to a story! Food for thought, don't you think?

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