5th Column

My dear exhausted voter,

I am writing to you at a time when you are supposed to go and vote to choose your local government representatives in a couple of days. I am sure you must be wondering whether there is no end to these elections, this being the third election in less than seven months that you are being asked to vote at.

You may recall that, these elections were originally due to be held more than two years ago. That was when Uncle Ranil made that infamous remark saying, “there is no election, even if there was an election, there is no money for an election”. Later, he was reprimanded by the highest court for that.

Some complain that the election is being held soon after the events at the Dalada Maligawa last week, saying it gives an unfair advantage to the rathu sahodarayas. There may be some truth in that, but the sahodarayas did want the election early and in fact it was the opposition which wanted it delayed.

You must be asking whether it is important to choose who builds your culverts, takes out your garbage and puts up sign posts on your roads, when it won’t change who governs the country. It is, for many reasons. It is a crucial election, even if it is not for you, at least for the parties who are contesting.

Consider the sahodarayas, for example. The Pink were swept into power last year in a wave of anger against the Blues, Greens, Light Greens and the Maroons. Anura sahodaraya got the top job. The maalimaawa got a two-thirds majority in Parliament. It was a historic change after seven decades.

Anura sahodaraya has been in office for over seven months and the maalimaawa has controlled Parliament for over five. There are changes in the way their ministers and MPs go about and there are no allegations of corruption against them yet, but many are asking whether that alone is enough?

It is true that their main promise of punishing the corrupt and the criminal cannot be achieved in a few months as it involves legal processes. Indeed, several former ministers have been detained and an IGP is suspended. The sahodarayas say this would have never happened under a different government.

Still, there is a growing feeling that this is only a NATO or “No Action, Talking Only” government. No major changes have happened since they took office. We haven’t heard much even about their big promises such as changing the Constitution or repealing the Prevention of Terrorism Act.

Then, there is a set of people whose mission is to embarrass Anura sahodaraya and his government. It began with Ranwala (who is still reading for his PhD, we presume) and includes Nalin who cannot count, Nilanthi of Uganda fame, Watagala who likes donkeys, and Jayakody who prefers monkeys.

There are others too who blunder regularly and make life at the top difficult for Anura sahodaraya. So, it is left to him and to him alone to run a ‘one man show’. That is why we see him huffing and puffing and sweating away campaigning, likely at the expense of more pressing matters of the state.

So, dear voter, because of all this, if you are thinking of voting for another party, you can look around. You may consider the ‘Light Greens’ or the telephone party. They should have reorganised their set up including their policies and perhaps even their leader after their defeats last year, as Imthiaz wanted.

That was not to be. If there is one lesson Sajith has learnt from Uncle Ranil, that is to never to let go of the leadership, despite defeat after defeat. Kabir thinks Sajith will be President by December. Let them wait till then! Still, they may have a chance winning Colombo, if smart Dr Ruvaiz plays it right.

For the maroon ‘pohottuwa’ fellows, reduced to rubble at the last election, they think this is their chance to return. Young Namal is doing his best but his surname remains a problem. The general view is that it is too early for most people to forgive and forget what happened when they were in charge.

Then you may also consider the Greens, but they are only a shadow of the Grand Old Party they once were. Apparently ‘retirement’ is not in Uncle Ranil’s dictionary. Many feel this is the beginning of the end for the Greens, but Rajitha believes Uncle Ranil will be back in charge by August, so why worry?

I am not sure whether you will even consider voting for the Blue party. I say so because even Satellite, its founder’s daughter and once herself the leader of the party has asked it not to use her image for publicity for the election. That is how proud she is of where the Blue party is now. Need we say more?

So, dear voter, I agree that this much awaited election doesn’t offer you much of a choice. Still, it is important for you to visit the polling booth on Tuesday to cast your vote because if you don’t and you are unhappy with the outcome, you have only yourself to blame. Remember, we are a democracy!

Yours truly,

Punchi Putha

PS: Uncle Ranil says no one will emerge as a clear winner at the election because of the ways seats are allocated in the councils, and asks the Light Green chaps to join him to defeat the ‘maalimaawa’. He would have been better off inviting the ‘pohottuwa’. They were once his partners, weren’t they?