Feeling blue over the Blues than the Greens

By Rypvanwinkle

My Dear Mahinda Maama,

I thought I must write to you when I saw you launching what was called the National Agricultural Policy, surrounded by a backdrop of green vegetables. I thought that was most appropriate, Mahinda Maama because that is precisely what has happened to you, being surrounded by green vegetables, led by Karu and his horu!

Anyway, I think you should worry more about the Blues than about the Greens surrounding you and you would have learnt why, at last week's Blue conference. There you were, proudly proclaiming like a maha kalu Sinhalaya that you had won back Silavaturai from the Tigers only to get a right royal snub from that good lady, Satellite!

Of course, her official excuse for not coming to the party was that a lecture was being given by a man who said he would plant manioc at the Bandaranaike Samadhi, but we all know that Madam has not given up her dream of heading the Blues again, don't we?

And don't forget that most of the Blues who routinely say 'yes, sir' to you now said 'yes, ma'm' just as easily to you-know-who. Just one hint that the balance of power in the Blue camp has shifted and they could be back with the lady before you could say 'Medamulana'! And then there are those like Captain Cool, the Clown Prince and the Cope Man who are only waiting for the signal from the 'Ma' camp to switch loyalties.

We did hear you say that the Blues was not a party that belonged to one particular family. I am not quite sure what you meant, Mahinda maama. Some say that you were taking a swipe at the Bees for heading the party for over fifty years. Others say it is a bit rich coming from a person whose three siblings hold very important positions in government!

I hope though, that you would be especially wary about that chap Mangala. You know only too well what he is capable of; he helped both Satellite and you to get to the top and he can well do the same to the Green Man, if you are not careful. And you can't deny that the 'Jana Rala' they are organising with the Greens are quite successful, can you?

I hope however, that you would do nothing to upset the Green Man. Remember, he is your best asset and these days he seems to have developed a particular fondness to make some controversial statement or other and get himself into a spectacular mess. Well, I would daresay that as long as he heads the opposition camp, half your battles are won!

But for the moment, Mahinda maama, it would help us if you could at least appear to be doing something to control the cost of living. And you know, having a hundred plus ministers, importing Aston Martins and starting an airline with your name on it hardly does anything to convince the people that you are indeed worried about the cost of living...

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha

PS – And if the going really gets tough, you can always take a leaf from our neighbours; just ask someone what the chaps in Bangladesh are doing and they will tell you how best to deal with former lady leaders who begin to become a nuisance...