5th Column

Winning demands: The Thonda style
My Dear Thonda,
I thought I must write to you after your recent quarrel with Satellite. You threatened to leave the government and in fact submitted letters of resignation but then came back saying all is well.

We have heard a lot of excuses for resigning from the government but yours was probably the best - because a parliamentarian from another party declared open a playground that was built by your party!

But of course, you did say that you had other issues and that probably included a ministry for yourself because you must surely be missing the perks of power now. However, apparently everything has been attended to after that little chat with Satellite. Could you tell us, Thonda, what exactly these demands are and how they were met? After all, the people elected you and they have a right to know.

Did you agree on what should be done with the Upper Kotmale hydropower scheme, for instance? And did Satellite give you the Civil Aviation ministry that you crave for so much? Or did she simply say, salakala balannam, and you came back empty handed, knowing only too well that to leave the government now would be to commit political suicide?

I believe we must give credit where it is due and Satellite, whatever her faults, made a telling point when she said 'yanawanam yana ekane eththe…' to the parties in her coalition. The smart lady that she is, she knows only too well that none of you will dare to leave because you do not want to sacrifice the privileges of power!

Thonda, could you also do us a favour and enlighten Wee Wee, Tilvin and those other rathu sahodarayas about how to get what they want from Satellite and her government. They go on stage and call Satellite a 'bibikkama' and threaten to resign and then meekly stay on, pretending to be deaf and dumb to all that is going on around them.

All they really need to do is to first hand over their resignations to the Pee Em who will not accept them, list all their demands on paper and then have a quiet chat with Satellite just like you did and they can get all they want, though, of course, it will deprive that Lalkantha chap an opportunity of slandering Satellite in public!

Now Thonda, I am sure you have also been careful to keep the Green Man informed of your plans at every stage. After all, your grandfather spent more than a dozen years in the Green cabinet supporting Junius. But then, in a democracy such as ours you don't have to worry about being elected from one party and supporting another party, do you?

The next big question for you now will be whom to support at the presidential poll. Since it will be the Pee Em who will be running from the blues, I don't think even Satellite will be too disturbed if you were to support the Green Man! But then, I'm sure you will have another set of demands ready by then!

Yours truly,
Punchi Putha
PS - We agree that all these threats of resignations from the government are good for democracy but the problem is the government's attitude now seems to be 'Rata perata yanawanam yana ekane eththe'…

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