Tricks of the trade
My Dear Ratne,
I thought of writing to you after seeing you on the Idiot Box campaigning
for the blues and hearing what you had to say.
To say the least, it was strange and surprising to hear you ask voters
to give a hundred and twenty seats to one single party; "if you can't vote
for the blues", you said, "vote for the greens, but whoever it is, give
a 120-seat mandate." Now, this is so different from your colleague, Avamangala
who is running around the country saying "if you can't vote for the blues,
vote for the reds!
Ratne, even in the best of times seven years ago when Satellite was
riding a wave of support and when there was an election which was by and
large free and fair, the blues and all its coalition partners put together-could
muster only a hundred and thirteen seats. So, surely you cannot be expecting
them to win a hundred and twenty seats now after inflicting seven years
of misery on the masses?
But what surprises all of us is why you are asking the people to vote
for the greens, if they cannot vote for the blues. Surely if you too asked
them to vote for the reds and the boys ended up with a decent number of
seats, you could have put together another "Pariwaasa Aanduwa". Why, it
would still be the "PA"!
Now Ratne, the greens have their own theory as to why you are saying
this. They say that you are not happy because Malli has now come back from
the greens and that you suspect that if the blues win, there is every chance
that Akka might appoint Malli as the Pee Em. Otherwise, it would look bad
on the family tree, isn't it? So, they say you want to spoil everything
by asking the people to vote for someone with a large majority- is this
true, Ratne?
After all, we all remember how you made a big fuss when all was set
for a National Government between the greens and the blues because of who
would occupy the Pee Em's chair. That National Government idea really collapsed
because of that, didn't it?
Of course, Malli is boldly announcing that if the blues win, you would
still be Prime Minister and that he has no intentions whatsoever of occupying
your seat. But he changes loyalties before every election and keeps crossing
over to the losing side. Can you take him seriously?
Anyway Ratne, we also heard that you had tried to get that Bronze Girl
to the stage at Horana but she ran away when she saw the television cameras.
Take my advice, Ratne and keep her away from your she campaign. She may
be the medal winning type but I don't think is the election winning type-
just ask Seeni Bola and he will tell you!
Even then, best of luck, Ratne, because you will surely need a lot of
it at the election.
Yours truly,
Punchi Putha.
PS- You sure missed a golden opportunity to get some "manaapa" recently.
Why, after that suicide bomber blasted himself at Narahaenpita, you should
have appeared on TV with an eye patch and bandaged legs maybe. |
