To laugh or cry at this abysmal ignorance!

By Carlton Samarajiwa

Y2K compliance is a millennium computer bugger.
Augosto Pinochet is a Greek legend.
Bill Gates is Bill Clinton's son.
PERC stands for Petroleum Exporting Regional Countries.
The Minister of Finance of Sri Lanka is E.L.B.Hurulle.
The capital of Maldives is Maldive fish.
The 2004 Olympic Games will be held in Sri Lanka.
SAFTA stands for Society of Asian Foreign Transport Association.

These are some of the answers given by applicants who sat for a Current Affairs test of twenty questions in early May this year, for recruitment as executive trainees in the banking sector. There were over 500 of them competing for about ten places.

And believe it or not, they are all graduates in their mid or late twenties, the majority of them holding degrees in Business Administration from the University of Sri Jayewardenepura. Some of them are Arts or Science graduates from Colombo, Kelaniya, Ruhuna, Vavuniya, Rajarata, Jaffna or Eastern universities. Many of them also have professional qualifications such as Membership of the Institute of Chartered Accountants or of the Chartered Institute of Management Accountants.

Does one cry or laugh at their bizarre answers (more examples follow) to simple questions of immediate current interest? Many of these graduates did not know the five Provincial Councils for which elections were held recently a matter of purely local interest. Some included the Eastern Province, the Southern Province and the Northern Province in their lists.

Who is to blame? These hapless products of our universities of which there are so many thousands now - men and women of little knowledge; or, the universities that produced them - degree factories engaged in the mass production of graduates? Can university educated man or woman, the two per cent who form the upper crust of our country's school population in a given year, afford to be ignorant men and women? Or is mere general knowledge a dispensable part of university education?

These are agonizing questions that our educational leaders will have to look at carefully. (Professor Carlo Fonseka, who is preparing a Common General Paper for the GCE (A/L) Examination, should certainly be interested.). In the meantime, here is a sample of other answers given by these young hopefuls knocking at the door of a private bank.

Question: What does PERC stand for?
Answers: People Environment Regional Center
Programme Evaluation Research Comity
Pacific East Regional Corporation
People's Elliance Red Cross
Pacific Economic Regional Countries
Pacific Economic Regional Council
Pacific Eastern Rehabilitation of Countries
Provincial Employment Regulation Council
Public Entertainment Republic Council
Provincial Economic Research Council
Peoplised Europe Republic Corporation

Question: Who is Augusto Pinochet?
Answers: a painter
a famous artist
an actor who won the Best Actor's award in USA
a famous writer
a stage drama actor
an Oscar award winner
the greatest writer in Russia
an artist
Nobel Prize winner
a motor racer
a piano player
a Catholic priest
a scientist
American State Secretary
UNO Higher Secretary
President of Korea
The late President of Spain
NATO Higher Secretary
President of NATO
Secretary of the United Nations
President of UNF
Albanian dictator
President of Republic of China
Former President of Turkey
President of Maldives
President of Cambodia
Prime Minister of France
Former President of South Africa
Russian Foreign Minister
President of USA
Former Emperor of Rome
Ancient Emperor ruled Europe
Japan Minister of Finance
Geurilla leader of Shaire
Leader of Kosovo
President of Ethiopia
Dictator of Fuji
President of UNCHR

Question: Who is Bill Gates?
Answers: Tthe capital of Yugoslavia, British finance minister, famous comedy actor,comedian actor of Bill Cosby, President of NATO, Vice President of USA,NATO spokesman, Prime Minister of England, Prime Minister of Australia, President of United Nations Association President of America, Champion of Olympics, Boxing player, Wife of Bill Clinton, Bill Clinton's son, Secretary of White House, Yugoslavian Prime Minister, President of WTO, President of International Monetary Fund, a cricketer, a tennis player, a football player, a famous musician, an Australian cricketer, Foreign Affairs Minister of England, President of America, President of Palasteen, Prime Minister of USA, President of Philippines, Tony Gates wife, a person who killed his wife and two children, a person who discovered the telephone, Monika, a cricket umpire, a sportsman, Minister of Defence of Britain, Nelson Mandela, Bill Clinton, a popular scientist, a philosopher, Chairman of World Bank, the person who started the currency crisis in Asia, Hollywood actor, a person who discount the bill.

In the late fifties after the switch to the swabasha as the medium of education, Principal of Mahinda College the late Mr E.A.Wijesuriya in his prize day address lamented that for the school products of that time Bacon was nothing more than a morsel of breakfast food, Milton a mouthwash, and Scott a native of Scotland. English literature had become for them "a closed book". How much more, alas, can be said on the same lines of today's graduates, for whom the president of the Maldives is Augusto Pinochet and its capital Maldive Fish!

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