The Sunday TimesPlus

29th September 1996

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Speak out!

by Mano Ratwatte

Quite often, cases of violence against women end up with the woman being on trial, having to undergo humiliation and being forced to believe she somehow "deserved" getting assaulted, raped or abused.

Here in the United States there are comprehensive Federal and State laws to punish offenders even within the institution of marriage. Even then, in a society where there is a relatively higher level of public awareness, there are many cases of domestic abuse, incest, rape and other incidents of violence which go unreported until and unless the media raises an issue.

Quite often, male adults take out their sexual and other frustrations by verbally and physically abusing their wives, and children. Quite often the victims are abused by alcohol and drug dependent male adults of their households. People in some developing countries tend to ignore these social problems. The victims often choose not to raise their concerns in public and suffer in silence, lest they be chastised for breaking cultural taboos and social constraints on the role of women. Such attitudes are unacceptable. We as a society pretend these serious social problems don't exist. Women sadly, may have been conditioned to accept verbal and physical abuse at the hands of their husbands because of existing social and cultural values.

Rape is a violent crime and must be viewed as such even within the context of marriage. Husbands have no right to rape their wives. Punishment against rape, and other forms of domestic physical abuse and incest must be severe and serve as a deterrent. Strong mandatory minimum sentencing statues, will deter prejudiced judges from letting offenders get off with light sentences. Quite often, cases of violence against women end up with the woman being on trial and having to undergo humiliation and being forced to believe that she somehow "deserved" getting assaulted, raped or abused.

There are results of insidious contradictory social standards governing gender interactions in Sri Lanka. For example, why do most men demand and expect their wives to be virgin when they marry? Why don't we have the same standard for men? Isn't it healthy that we do that in the age of AIDS? Isn't it prudent that we at least have mandatory testing for sexually transmitted diseases before men get married? Why do we accept these double standards about social conduct? Society tolerates and turns a blind eye to male sexual promiscuity, yet suppresses its women from even speaking out against domestic abuse. These pseudo middle- class bourgeoisie attitudes allow us to view spousal abuse and domestic violence in somewhat of a lesser light than other crimes. No wife, husband, girlfriend or child "deserves" to be verbally abused, beaten or molested. There are far more amicable ways of settling differences of opinion within a family. Violence is morally reprehensible. By strengthening the existing statues, and by having mandatory sentencing guide-lines we can eliminate gender bias on the part of judges who after all are products of our contradictory social standards.

The same can be said of sexual harassment in Sri Lanka and the perverts who prey on women using public transportation. There is a notion amongst lots of men that "jacking" as it is widely known, is acceptable behaviour in crowded buses and trains. This weird form of behaviour is perhaps unique to the Sri Lankan male species. Seldom does a woman speak out against such humiliation. Such endemic predatory sexual behaviour can be eliminated by first acknowledging that there is a indeed a widespread problem, and second through public education and tougher laws to bring the offenders to justice.

However neither laws nor education will reduce the incidents of abuse and harassment if the victims don't speak out. They should not blame themselves or be ashamed to bring child abusers, and sex offenders (even if it is a husband) to justice. It is time we realise no woman or child "deserves" to be verbally or physically abused or raped no matter what the male's perspective is, and it is time we acknowledge rape to be what it really is: the most humiliating form of violent crime which has nothing to do with love or passion.

In the long term, only a concerted public and private sector sponsored educational campaign and an improved legal framework will change modern Lankan society's treatment of its women and children. If the collective conscience does not speak out against abuse of women at work, buses or at home and abuse of its children, society loses its pretensions to be a higher order of civilization by virtue of its religious and social values.

In conclusion, it is prudent to heed the word of Eleanor Roosevelt who said, "No woman can be made to feel inferior without her consent".


High drama at sea

By Shelani de Silva

'May Day, May Day,' the desperate call went out from the ship Lord Nelson. Caught in a fierce storm at Galle harbour last Sunday, the ship had broken anchor and been swept on to treacherous rocks at Unawatuna. In a dramatic rescue, mounted by the Navy and villagers, four crew members were able to leave the ship safely, but one perished in the rough seas.

The drama began when 'Lord Nelson' registered under the name 'Captain Hassen' which was to sail to Dubai had to divert from its route to Galle due to technical problems. Having docked at the Galle harbour the ship had gone through a thorough test and was ready to set sail. Limited space at the Galle harbour meant the ship was compelled to be at the out harbour and was anchored about three and a half miles away from the shore.

The nightmare for the five crew members started on Sunday evening with the onset of strong winds and rough seas. With the weather growing worse the crew found themselves trapped in the ship for nearly 12 hours, with no communication and in total darkness. Unfortunately the day before the incident the captain had left the ship and the Third Officer Mr. Mohammed Ibrahim Mohommed Hathi was in charge.

On Saturday evening, while Mr. Hathi was on the bridge he had felt the vessel being dragged. "I sent an officer to check the anchor and he reported back saying that it had moved a few feet but had a good grip. I tried to make VHF contact through the Galle radio but was unable to get a positive response. But by this time the vessel had stopped dragging," he said.

By 2.00 am on Sunday morning however, the wind had grown very strong and a storm had broken out. By this time Mr. Hathi had seen smoke coming from the engine room and had immediately asked the chief engineer to check it. With great difficulty they had put the fire out.

"Around 4.45 am the ship suddenly started drifting to the rocks and the anchor parted from the chain. I knew we were in danger and informed the Galle radio to rescue us. With the ship hitting the rocks our communication too came to a standstill. We were at the mercy of the VHF service but this too was very faint," said Mr. Hathi.

Around 7.00 am. rescue operations commenced. But as the winds were strong, the rescue ships were unable to get close. The crew members had been told not to panic and that fishing boats along with the harbour boats were coming to their rescue,

"One fisherman jumped into the water, and tried to throw a line to the ship. We prepared to come down a rope ladder. The first to get off was T. A. Deenon. He was a good swimmer, but reaching the bottom step he was hit by strong waves and though we tried to pull him up, he was dashed on the rocks," Mr. Hathi said.

After their colleague's tragedy, the crew members had given up hopes of being saved. The only thing they could do was watch the number of ships trying to get close and hope and pray. "By this time the Navy had arrived and they asked us not to get down the rope ladder. Even a life saver tried to get close but he was also thrown onto the rocks. We asked them to contact the Air Force so that we could be airlifted. We were asked to send a thick rope to them and they tried to get us by that, but by then some villagers had managed to come on to the rocks near the front of the ship," said Mr. Hathi.

This brought some hope. "There were two villagers and they reassured us that they would come to the ship and even carry us to shore. They were practically willing to sacrifice their lives. Again we sent a rope to them and they tied it on the rock. Then we got a chair and managed to slide down," said Mr. Hathi.

The first person to go out was T. S. Jaufeer. Although it had looked safe he had had his doubts. "Especially after we lost our colleague I was worried, but the villagers were very encouraging," said Mr. Jaufeer and "one by one we descended and reached the rescue boats". The nightmare was over only once they reached the shore.

Though grieved by the death of one of their colleagues, these men accepted their hazardous ordeal as part and parcel of life at sea.

"After all, these things happen at sea, and we have to get used to it" said Mr. Hathi.

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