The Gossip Column

18th February 1996

By Our Gossip Columnist



A Bouquet

With carnage in Fort following the Central Bank blast, VIP security was tight. Came the February 4 and all eyes were on Independence Square. At Rosmead Place 'Tintakel' bristled with commandos. At eight sharp, the white coated helmeted ceremonial motor cycle escort awaited the Premier outside the tall iron gates. Deadlines passed, the twenty-one gun salute echoed round Colombo but no sight of the Prime Minister. The Grand Old Lady, resting on medical advice, was far away in Beruwala. Only top Coppers knew that she would not attend. Foreign envoys were quick to acknowledge the wisdom of the charade. "Given your country's situation it is insane for the President and PM to gather in one place, however important the occasion is", said one Commonwealth High Commissioner formerly a top intelligence operative.


And a brickbat

Ambassadors to assemble at a given point and then to be transported in groups to the ceremonial opening of Parliament appears acceptable though barely so in the given circumstances. But, to be body searched before boarding, in addition to metal detectors and frisking at Jayawardenapura, is a bit too much. Many wanted to boycott. "Our persona is foreign territory", quipped one. Surely the Protocol Division can identify all heads of missions. Not even at Westminster, with such a huge diplomatic corp in London, are envoys subject to such indignities.


Et tu brutes

The leader the blues never had, must wonder at the strange ways of some former friends and colleagues. Almost 10 years ago he was presented with Jeffrey Archer's political drama - "First among Equals". Inside in a bold fist and preceding a full signature was the narrative: To Our "first" (And there are no equals). With best wishes from... Today the presenter busies himself with burning tyres and organizing hoots to "welcome" his former hero! A clue - this particular Judas is prominent with silkworms' diet.


Diligent Prince

He's back and working! The Sunshine State has really pepped him up. Last week saw the Crown Prince joining the Green membership drive. Elephant branch gatherings trumpeted an enthusiastic welcome for the Portly One. Later that day he was deep in blue country. A mediocre attendance by activists brought a sharp reprimand. "You won't win elections like this", growled the District Leader with MPs Pradeep Hapangama and Jayalath Jayawardene looking on. As for thuggery, do not let it worry you, said the Prince. The two toughies, Upali G and J-Raj, will scurry for cover when the heat is on. Later, he found time to visit a colleague - the Govt's unwilling guest in Kalutara. Altogether a busy tour.


And a Queen

The Elderly Uncle of a respected top Tamil Public Servant now retired, had with much difficulty found his way to the metropolis after an arduous journey from Jaffna. When asked by his nephew on the ground situation in Jaffna, the old gentleman had patted his nephew's hand and observed sagely "Thambi, - Jaffna, Chandrika is Queen." Is this a little glimmer of hope in the winning of hearts and minds?


No entry

For a parachutist bureaucrat, the early Seventies were salad days. Secretary to one, adding to another, savings, directing exports; he was true blue and conveniently pink. So adept was our rotund one that he even tutored Court circles. Came the day of the Fox and the high flier's junkets were numbered, lobbying failed and so with some acidic support it was Big Ben and ocean affairs. Then, on to Hapsburg glitter and old waltzes. Alas, time marches on wages become pensions. But no real retirement for this long jumper. Doing the rounds recently in Colombo, he put about an ambition. If the Greens return, he wants to be wrapped like "kadi". And why not? he posits. Oxbridge Yal Devi - he is as ready a choice. The ground work is to be laid by old triple crosser chum. But elephant memories are long.


Deadlier than the Male

Extra security measures seems to have antagonized many a person recently. At the Gallantry awards held at the BMICH even those in the Armed Services and those receiving the awards and medals were frisked upon entering. One Irate Lady officer who found the arms of security officers frisking her irritating not to mention humiliating got so fed up that she lifted her skirt saying "Menna Onetharang Balanda!!" (Here look as much as you want).


Some in the hill country were not too happy with the promotion of the new general, hard on the heels of the Central Bank bombing. Such is the fickleness of public adulation up with flag at one time and down with the debris, the next.


Many were wondering as to why the opposition leader did not attend the National Day celebrations. The fact is , he did so, but his security was barred from coming into the Independence Square with him. His Chief of Security, a senior ASP was told by one of the officers on duty, "You are to remain in the car!!" As the overall attitude was that, the opposition leader too decided not to attend and left as soon as he came!! Come National Day and celebrations in a tense atmosphere with the highest security all around. Even the Jayamangala Gatha usually intoned by school children, was replaced by a some sweet smiling girls from the army women's corp.


What with Russian, Thai, Koreans and Indian ladies of the night descending on to our shores to give our freeweeling gentry unmentionable pleasure. One would wonder what next!!? Well, the latest rumour is of a Japanese group operating in the hill capital. Though modus operandi is still vague, sources state that they were operating from a well known hotel.


A prominent National List Green MP, who at one time held sway over the hill capital's Pradeshiya Sabha visited the ceramic shop in Bambalapitiya recently, with his wife. After the purchase of goods, he had gone to the wrapping. The wrapper had shouted across to his assistant to send him a blue colour wrapping paper. The Green MP disappointed over the wrapper's choice of colours had protested: "I can only use Blue colour paper as toilet paper in my house!!" The quick witted assistant, noticing that the MP's wife was wearing a Blue saree had replied "In that case, why don't you ask the lady to leave her saree behind with us as well!!?


Fiery salvo

When the Fire Brigade came under the purview of the Air Force, the opposition leader sprung into action, asking Mayor Ganeshalingam to issue a statement. He waited and waited but no statement came. Once again the opposition leader fired a second call and no response was forthcoming. It was an irate opposition leader who called the dodging Mayor a third time, and after a fiery salvo, put.. the statement was out the next day!


Labour lost

Also in the news, rumours of steps to take over the supervision of the Foreign Employment Bureau from Minister Mahinda Rajapaksa. The President apparently wants the Bureau to come under her purview. The reason is not clear, though there have been charges that it was the Minister's followers who got preference over others, when the choice to go overseas for jobs came up. It was also not long ago that the President publicly accused Minister Rajapaksa of leaking out Cabinet stories to the press. When the water scare story started hitting the streets of Colombo on Tuesday night, it was Minister Fowzie who sprung into action in the middle of the night. He not only got the Govt. Analysist office opened, but was also the one who got the water samples brought in, and when the Analyist had stated that she was not able to work alone, he even got assistants brought in and personally was present until the testing was completed. As the story goes the rumour had spread from the hospital when a number of patients were brought in with food poisoning. Minister Fowzie left nothing to chance, here as well; quickly moving in and getting the patients vomit, stool and urine samples also brought in and tested so that he could be sure that the results were negative. Therefore, why many ask did the Portly One eventually take the credit. It was Minister Nimal Siripala de Silva who appeared on T.V. appealing for calm and stating that everything was under control!! Perhaps Minister Fowzie needed a good rest from the previous night's hard work!!

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