Columns - 5th column

Don’t let next week rob us of this week’s joy!

By Rypvanwinkle

“Thaaththa,” Bindu Udagedera asked, “is it true that the tourist industry is booming?”
“Some people claim that the number of tourists coming here has increased,” Bindu’s father Percy agreed, “but why do you ask?”
“Why, thaaththa,” Bindu explained, “so many foreigners are visiting us to try and tell us what to do...”
“And who are all these people?” Percy wanted to know, “are you talking about the Indians who came here for their award ceremony?”
“No, of course not,” Bindu said, “that probably hurt tourism because so many people said they were not coming here...”
“Who are all these visitors then?” Percy wondered.

“Why, thaaththa, some Americans are here and then there are some gentlemen from the United Nations...” Bindu explained.
“Is that all?” Percy inquired.
“No, even that Japanese special envoy is here...” Bindu observed.
“So, what do they all want?” Percy was curious.
“Well, it is one year since the war ended...” Bindu pointed out.
“Are they here for the celebrations, then?” Percy was puzzled.
“No, of course not,” Bindu said, “I think they are here to see that we are dealing with the war related problems in a fair manner...”
“In other words,” Percy said, “they are here to tell us what we should be doing...”
“I suppose some may say that,” Bindu said, “but the Japanese gentleman was quite clear that no one should be telling us what we should do...”

“Now, that is a welcome change...” Percy declared.
“And,” Bindu said, “he also said that any aid that Japan gives us will not be linked to such conditions...”
“What are the gentlemen from the United Nations here for, then?” Percy wanted to know.
“They are the ones who are posing problems, thaaththa...” Bindu observed.
“Why do you say that?” Percy asked.
“They are here to tell us that they will be appointing a committee to study what happened during the final stages of the war...” Bindu said.
“And why do they want to do that?” Percy was puzzled.
“Well,” Bindu said, “I think they want to find out whether any war crimes were committed in the final stages of the war...”
“And I suppose they would also want to find out whether any white flags were waved or not...” Percy suggested.

“They probably want to look into that too...” Bindu agreed.
“So, what have they said after visiting us?” Percy queried.
“They still say they want go ahead with this committee...” Bindu pointed out.
“I think we may have missed a trick here...” Percy said.
“And what trick is that, thaaththa?” Bindu wanted to know.
“Why, we should not have wasted so much money on those Indian film awards...” Percy proposed.
“But what has the Indian film awards got to do with these visits?” Bindu was puzzled.
“Why, Bindu,” Percy said, “we could have used all that money and given all these UN chaps free flights and top class hotel accommodation...”
“And what would happen then?” Bindu wanted to know.
“Then, maybe we could have closed the roads for traffic wherever they went and had a grand ceremony for them at the Sugathadasa Stadium where they could be honoured for their tireless humanitarian work...” Percy said.

“And what else could we do?” Bindu was sceptical.
“Why, we could have even got young Namal to organize a cricket match for them...” Percy was enthusiastic.
“And how will that help?” Bindu wondered.
“Why we could have a game between Ban Ki moon’s eleven versus Gota’s eleven and we could even get Sanath to open the batting for Gota’s team just to ensure that Ban Ki moon’s team wins...” Percy declared.
“I’m not so sure about all that, thaaththa,” Bindu was not convinced.
“Why do you say that?” Percy was puzzled.
“Why, thaaththa,” Bindu explained, “they are still saying they will go ahead with this UN committee...”
“Then there is only one other course of action...” Percy observed.
“And what is that?” Bindu asked.
“We must make the UN committee work like the UNP committee...” Percy suggested.
“And what exactly do you mean by that?” Bindu inquired.
“Why, Bindu,” Percy pointed out, “just look at what that committee in the UNP is doing...”
“Why,” Bindu asked, “aren’t they finding out the views of all concerned before making their recommendations?”

“Yes,” Percy said, “that is what they are supposed to be doing...”
“And what is wrong with that?” Bindu wanted to know.
“But in doing that,” Percy explained, “everyone is taking potshots at the leader and trying to get rid of him so that they could become the leader instead of trying to find out what has gone wrong with the party...”
“So,” Bindu asked, “how can we make the UN committee like the UNP committee?”
“Maybe we should say that the next Secretary General of the UN should be from the Hambantota district and then they will all start fighting with each other...” Percy suggested.
Bindu didn’t quite know what to say to that.

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