No more cringing over wedding gifts

By Ishani Ranasinghe

The past few months have sure been hectic. It is as if everyone suddenly woke up one day and decided to get married, one after the other. Now this may sound like I’m complaining but I’m really not. I love weddings; it is after all about two people who really love each other getting married. Or as my best friend puts it, this is the perfect chance to get all dressed up.

Anyway, one thing I don’t like about weddings is the gift buying bit. Why you may wonder? Simply because it is just so hard to get right. Think about it, you would want to buy a gift that they would like not something they would just leave aside or just wrap and pass it on to someone else, most probably the wedding they attend next.

So it’s always nice to give them a gift they might just like. Now if you are close friends of the people getting married then you wouldn’t really have that much of trouble figuring out what to buy, but when it’s someone you hardly know, that’s when the problem strikes.

This is why a bridal registry is a blessing in disguise for such stressed out and clueless gift buyers.

A bridal registry is a system designed by department stores for the purpose of allowing couples who intend on tying the knot to manage purchases of gifts for their wedding. Gone are the days when you open your gifts and cringe. Now you can receive gifts you require and won't have to worry about unwrapping the same gift twice.

In Sri Lanka there are some stores, which offer this option, one of them being ODEL Home. Hence I figured where better to head than this haunt of almost every shop-goer to find out how it works.

This is how it works…

Once you decide to have a bridal registry, the couple is asked to create a list of items they would like to have looking at what is available in the store. Thereafter a small card is given to them to send to their guests with their wedding invitations to let them know that they have a wedding registry opened at the store.

As a guest purchases a gift, the department store's list is updated and the item is removed from the list and the gift is reserved. This can be efficient both for the couple-to-be as well for guests who don't have to make decisions over what to buy.

Thereafter the store delivers these gifts to you… see it’s as simple as that. The bridal registry at ODEL is even available online, so for those of you who are busy with a hectic lifestyle they can just buy it anytime of the day by visiting their website.

It is said that the selection of a bridal registry should be done early in the wedding planning process (at least two months in advance). This really does provide the couple with the opportunity of pre-planning their new home furnishings in advance.

However, bridal registries are not always well received. Particularly older guests can view them as vulgar. Soliciting gifts can be seen as an insult to traditional gift-buying notions such as “being grateful for what you receive”, the element of surprise, and leading to gift buying as a type of competition since the couple know how much has been spent on each gift and who spent it. It has led to the more controversial practice of couples asking guests to give them money instead of presents, in cultures where this is not the practiced norm.

So just to save you from being as they would call it ‘frowned upon’ the proper etiquette for informing your guests about your selected registry is to request your bridesmaids, mothers, relatives and your ever-faithful friends to spread the word. It is generally considered rude to include bridal registry information (or the notices provided by the stores) in your wedding invitations since guests are not obligated to give the bride and groom a gift. But most stores gives a cute card that goes along with it and that is something you can include in the gift. It adds something to the gift.

People might not be that comfortable with the idea of a bridal registry but people are getting the hang of it and they are starting to use it.

Well which ever way it’s received bridal registries give you the opportunity to give the people you care about a gift they would love and not something they would cringe at.

So before we make a toast to the bride and groom… here’s a toast to bridal registries.