All Sri Lankan parliamentarians take the bow at the Speaker with great panache -it is a ritual that is observed with a passion, like some cricketer's ritual-kissing of the bat before taking guard.

But this bow is absolution. It means in the Sri Lankan parliament that all respect for the process is left at the door, when an MP enters the house, bent double, as if this show of deference makes all the difference.

But this week for instance, only 32 MPs took that bow - because the others thought it is not possible to take a bow this week - except possibly to their barbers or their hairdressers. Exactly 32 members were in the house when the most important issue of the current point in time (North East) was taken up, after the opposition asked for the debate as if they have been starved of parliamentary thrust and parry and were feeling they had hit the nadir, almost as if they have been starved of petrol for their Pajeros.

Why come to parliament when the only person you need to bow in the talks-show culture is the TV make-up man? Instead of taking television cameras to parliament, an issue about which there has been considerable debate, Sri Lankan MPs need to stand this thing on the head, and take parliament to the talk shows. Or better still make talk shows, which they are over-fond of, the National Assembly.

Wimal Weerawansa after taking his customary bow at the make-up man, proceeded to say that the government ought to resign. Future parliamentary correspondents of the Lankan media will be getting the knack of writing that kind of copy very soon, and as if that is not enough, they will say the MP said it on that 'august' channel TNL, Swarnavahini, ITN or whatever, because parliamentary correspondents don't generally say more than ten words without using that adored cliché 'august assembly.'

In television all parliamentarians, besides, look more like dashing movers and shakers. In parliament, they are only 'movers.' (Motions all over the floor, they said.) For instance, at the adjournment debate on the North East situation, all the movers of the motion save for one, were absent when for the debate - they only believed in 'moving and scooting', and were doing the shaking part with all those talks show hosts. G. L. Peiris, and others, most of them who are now like the furniture in the talk show world, were not there when the debate ended. Only Wimal Weerawansa was there at the conclusion of the debate from those who moved the motion including such noted national saviours such as Dinesh Gunawardnene and Ven. Bedegama Samitha. The entire opposite front bench was bare for most of the time, except for a short while when Mahinda Rajapakse spoke (he scooted off ) and for the intermittent presence of Nimal Siripala de Silva.

In computer jargon, of the particularly vicious computer geek type, when one computer wants to send a document to another, they use that rather business-like word 'export.' Absentee ministers perhaps thought it is best to 'export'key national issues out of parliament, and keep parliament for various quaint performances such as bowing to the speaker and getting into fights (strictly when schoolboys are there in the gallery only) .

Hmmm, might be a good thing, because if Television is becoming the National Assembly, at least these blokes will not physically tear each other apart - though it has nearly come to that in some shows, before Chamuditha Samarawickreme steps into negotiate a quick Memorandum of Understanding. Besides, Chamuditha Samarawickreme has won awards for this type of mediation - whereas Speaker Joseph Michael Pererea has not won anything recently except for his seat at the last election.

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