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16th December 2001

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Dreaming of a right Christmas this year

By Nedra Wickremasinghe

The season has begun for sure-we have been hearing "Jingle Bells" since November. We're bombarded by TV commercials and print advertisements reminding us to buy, buy and buy, so it's certainly not easy for us to get past the Christmas season's spend, spend, spend mentality. With just 10 days for Christmas you can see the frenzied shoppers running hither and thither trying to complete their shopping lists and guest lists preparing for an all out celebration this year.

But if you already feel stressed out, having had a very difficult or a successful year, perhaps you may not be inclined to splurge or be a late-night hostess this Christmas. It doesn't help either when you know that the wonderful anticipation you felt as a child on Christmas morning has been replaced by the knowledge that the bills for this one period of excess and extravagance will be arriving in the New Year. If, you want to be true to yourself and want a change you can make this December different from all the other Christmases you have had.

All it takes is some effort and soul-searching to rediscover the meaning of this season and let it be known to your loved ones, family and children - that Christmas is the time of giving and sharing. Children wait with much anticipation for Christmas morning to open their gifts. Fine, but they must be told about the less fortunate, the aged and the sick, that no celebration is complete without you doing something for the needy.

If you are the type determined not to break the traditions of celebrating Christmas - do go ahead, but "packing it all" into the month of December and trying to be a good Samaritan can be a hassle. Certainly you may perhaps, find solace if you had done your good deed in the past months without keeping it all for Christmas - if not, it is best that you see that your goodwill is spread over the months. This way you will feel good about yourself.

Here are some suggestions to get you through this Christmas:

• Give all year: Spread your love over the months instead of waiting for Christmas. Give a call to your old Aunt once in a while or make the time to take your grandfather for an ice-cream. Make an extra "I appreciate you" call or send a note expressing all the mushy feelings you might be too embarrassed to say out loud to your loved ones or your mentor or guru, for instance.

• Volunteer: Make the time! It can mean so much more than simply writing a cheque to charity (though that's nice too). Reach out to the needy and make your contribution in cash or kind to the many charitable organizations that deal with mental health, disabled, cancer or Alzheimer patients. Spend a memorable Christmas morning delivering meals to an orphanage or to singing carols to the aged.

• Find your religion: Whether it is a church, temple or mountain top where you find spiritual edification - do it. This is the time to stop and think about the history and spirituality of what you are celebrating.

• Gift giving: When you go shopping for gifts, buy well thought-out gifts rather than buying for the sake of giving. Sometimes a home-made food item, or a framed child's work of art or hand-made set of place mats or a box of bon-bons will make your family members very happy.

• Relive old traditions or create new ones: Turkey with stuffing and cranberry sauce is fine but if you can't - it can be chicken or duck or whatever. Think of traditional family menus, even the basic macaroni pie, a pot-roast or grandma's Queen of pudding's; they're all good enough when the family gets together on Christmas day, with new additions of grandchildren and in-laws, nieces and nephews. Pass out carol sheets and sing along to catch the true spirit of Christmas. With large families, come to an arrangement to give gifts only for kids-this way you are less burdened with expenses.

• Look back before you forge ahead: Take stock of the previous year for only then can you move forward. Reflect on whether it has been an year of blessings, pain and growth. Taking all this into consideration, try to make resolutions to find a balance between career and personal life. I hope your look back will help propel you to a much higher place or a whole new start in the coming New Year.



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